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कैसे पी लेते हैं

पाकिस्तान के राष्ट्रपति कह रहे हैं
की पाक एशिया में शांति बनाए रखने की हर संभव कोशिश करेगा
समझ नही आता लोग 6-7 बजे ही कैसे पी लेते हैं

Uploaded By: Aakash Jul,20 2016
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Kaun Sa Role

Meera: Mujhe english film me kaam karne ka bahut shauk hai.
Host: Aapko role kaun sa pasand hai?
Meera: Keeme wala. Spring role bhi chal jata hai.

Uploaded By: Julie Dec,3 2015
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Race

100 metre ki race ho rahi thi.
Referee said 1,2,3 GO.
Everybody started running except Alia bhatt.
Referee: Y r u not running?
Alia: My number is 4.

Uploaded By: Jessie Nov,21 2015
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IRCTC

Deepika: Will you come to see my Chennai Express?
Alia: No IRCTC site is not working.

Uploaded By: Angel Nov,17 2015
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Pahli Bar

Mallika arrived at a Railway Station for a shooting.
Bhikhari: Behanji 1 rupiya dedo. Malika gave him 1000 Rs.
Secretary: Why u gave him 1000 Rs.
Malika: Pehli bar kisine behan kaha.

Uploaded By: Sanjjana Nov,3 2015
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Income Tax Returns

Alia bhatt: Hey dad, what plans for weekend?
Mahesh bhatt: Income Tax Returns.
Alia bhatt: Hey first part kab release hua tha?
Mahesh bhatt: Jaa meri ma, tu shooting pe jaa.

Uploaded By: Munni Oct,29 2015
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जल्दी जल्दी बताओ

टीचर – जल्दी जल्दी बताओ ,
अजय देवगन की वाईफ का क्या नाम है ?
कुतुबमीनार कहाँ है ??
शताब्दी एक्सप्रेस कितनी रफ़्तार से चलती है ?
मुर्गी क्या देती है ?

.

.

.
पप्पू – काजोल , दिल्ली में , 140 की रफ़्तार से , अंडे देती है
टीचर बेहोश

Uploaded By: Julie Oct,27 2015
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Swimming Pool

Film Director to Actress: Tum ko 100 feet ki height se swimming pool me jump lagana hai.
Actress: Par mere ko tairna nahi aata, mein doob jaunga.
Film Director: Don't worry, pool me paani nahi hai.

Uploaded By: Angel Sep,25 2015
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ChameLee

Brucelees Favourites:
Favourite Vegetable: MuLee,
Favourite Animal: BilLee,
Favourite Actor: ChameLee,
Favourite Timepaas: KhujLee.

Uploaded By: Sneha Aug,31 2015
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Bollywood Emails

MallikaSherawat: I_dont_need_to_act@overexposureworks.com
AmishaPatel: Kaho_na_pyaar_hai@wasmyonlyhit.com
KareenaKapoor: oh_iam_so_cute_and_talented@nobodyelsethinksso.com
Raveena Tandon: waiting_for_third_umpire@stumped.com

Uploaded By: Abhishek Aug,28 2015
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Florist

Alia Bhat at florist,
Uncle ek April fool dena.

Uploaded By: Mariya Aug,21 2015
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Maar Mary Maar

Pehle Mary Kom movie ka Title bhi Bhag Milka Bhag ki Tarah hi Rakha tha.
Par jab unhone Title ko Dobara Pada to Fir to Badalna hi Pada:
Maar Mary Maar

Uploaded By: Sunny Aug,17 2015
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Sunny Leone

Sunny Leone: Meri next Hindi Movie horror hai...
Main Sab Ko Dara Ke Rakh Dungi.
Pappu: Darr Toh Aapki Pehle Ki Movies Mein Bhi Lagta Tha,
Kahi Peechhe Se Mummy Papa Na Aa Jaayein

Uploaded By: Nikki Aug,17 2015
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Join Congress

Dear Deepika.
U went to Yuvraj, his form dropped.
U went to Ranbir, his movie flopped.
U went to Mallyas, their airline stopped.
Plz join Congress & Save India.

Uploaded By: Munni Aug,5 2015
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Sawal Hi Khada


Alok nath: Sunny darling tumhe kam kapdo me dekh kar mere man me ek sawal khada hota he....
Sunny leone:Chup buddhe aj kal tere case me sirf sawal hi khada hota he...

Uploaded By: Priya Jul,27 2015
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Kheechega ki Nahinn!

Aaj Poke Kar raha hai, kal friend request bechega,
Aaj ‘Like’ kar raha hai, kal ‘Comment’ karega,
Aaj photo ‘tag’ kar raha hai. kal photo keechega,
Kheechega ki nahinn!

Uploaded By: Sneha Jul,20 2015
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Bijali Ka Bill

Aamir’s Mother asks Aamir – ” Beta ye aajkal Bijli ka Bill itana zyada kyu aa raha hai?? ”
Aamir replies – ” Mai kabhi batlaata nahi… Par andhere se darta hu mai Ma !!! ”

Uploaded By: Rahul Jul,20 2015
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Malika Aur Bhikhari

Mallika arrived at a Railway Station for a shooting.
Bhikhari: Behanji 1 rupiya dedo. Malika gave him 1000 Rs.
Secretary: Why u gave him 1000 Rs..?
Malika: Pehli bar kisine behan kaha!

Uploaded By: Admin Jul,14 2015
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Japan Radio

Alia: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Alia: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is ?All India Radio...

Uploaded By: Jessie Jul,9 2015
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Mamuli Muli

Rakhi Sawant Ne Sabzi Mandi Mein Bahut Lambi Muli Dekhi Aur Puchha
Rakhi Sawant: “Ye Kya Hai?”
Sabji Wala: “Ji, Ye Hamare Liye Muli Hai Aur Aapke Liye Mamuli“

Uploaded By: Sachin Rana Jul,9 2015
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Baba Saxidas Ji

Salman Khan Ne Baba Saxidas Ji Ka Bada Naam Suna Tha
To Ek Din Ja Pahuncha Unke Pass Aur Bola
Salman Khan: “Kitne Percent Log Samajte Hai Ki Meri Aur Katrina Ki Shaadi Hogi?”
Baba Ji: “Sirf 10%”
Salman: “Just 10% Why?”
Baba Ji: “Kyuki 90% Log Khud Katrina Se Shaadi Karna Chahte Hai“

Uploaded By: Sophia Jul,7 2015
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रॉंग नंबर

संता -भाई कल तो मैंने दीपिका पादुकोण से
फोन पे बात की ,
बंता – ओये क्या बात कर रहा है ,
क्या कहा उसने ??
संता (ख़ुशी से)- उसने कहा –
रॉंग नंबर

Uploaded By: Sachin Rana Jul,7 2015
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Dad Caught His Son

Dad Caught His Son Watching Sheela Ki Jawani Song.
Dad: Padhaai kar Le Beta. Sheela Toh Exams Ke Baad Bhi Jawan Rahegi

Uploaded By: Raj Jul,6 2015
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47 Saal Ka SALMAN

47 Saal Ka SALMAN KHAN Ladki Dekhney Gya,
Ladki Ki Maa Behosh Ho Gai, Hossh Aaya,
Karan Pucha Tho Boli…..
25 Saal Pahle Yeh Mujhe Bhi Dekhney Aaya Tha

Uploaded By: Neeta Jul,6 2015
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Johny Leaver

 

Johny Walker : Mere pass bangla hai, gadi hai, bank loker hai, Kya hai tumhare pass ? Johny Leaver : Mere pass in sabki chabi hai.

Uploaded By: Rahul Jul,4 2015
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Saree 1 Lac Ki

Bhakt : Meri shadi Aishwarya se kara do.
Bhagwan : Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.
Bhakt : Koi upay bhagvan
Bhagvan : Mallika Sherawat.

Uploaded By: Gujju Jul,3 2015
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Basanti Ki Izzat

Basanti : Bhag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.
Dhanno : Tujhe apni padi hai meri soch jiske peeche GABBAR ke 10 ghode pade hai.

Uploaded By: Rahul Jul,3 2015
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Chal dekhte hai


Azam Khan- Sirji election time kitna
boring hai, chalo kuch game khelte
hain.
Mulayam- Chal dekhte hai hum
dono mein se sabse bada bakchod
kon hai.

Uploaded By: Santi Jun,10 2015
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Most BOYS


Most BOYS don't lyk
Touch screen mobile
U know why?
Jinhe dabane ki aadat ho
Unhe bas touch karne
me kahan maza aayega.

Uploaded By: Tina Jun,10 2015
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Jawani Song


Dad Caught His Son Watching Sheela Ki Jawani Song.
Dad: Padhaai kar Le Beta. Sheela Toh Exams Ke Baad Bhi Jawan Rahegi.

Uploaded By: Jessie Jun,10 2015
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Boss


Raabert: Boss, mere dono bachon ke liye koi naam bataiye..
Ajeet: Ek ka naam rakho Peter
Raabert: boss or doosre ka ?
Ajeet: Repeater.

Uploaded By: Farhan Jun,10 2015
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EK Lac Ki Hai


Bhakt : Meri shadi Aishwarya se kara do.
Bhagwan : Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.
Bhakt : Koi upay bhagvan
Bhagvan : Mallika Sherawat.

Uploaded By: Julia Jun,10 2015
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pahli Baar Behen

Mallika arrived at a Railway Station for a shooting. 
Bhikhari: Behanji 1 rupiya dedo. Malika gave him 1000 Rs. 
Secretary: Why u gave him 1000 Rs..? 
Malika: Pehli bar kisine behan kaha!

Uploaded By: Munni Jun,6 2015
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Mallika Ka Suitcase

Mallika ko airport pe customs walon ne roka aur poocha: Madam is TIFFIN BOX me kya hein?? 
Mallika: Stupid ye mera suitcase hein.

Uploaded By: Tina Jun,6 2015
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Sunny Leone cloths

Look at the irony of life
Aamir Khan has to take off his clothes to act in Bollywood
And Sunny Leone has to wear clothes to act in Bollywood.

 

Uploaded By: Liza Jun,3 2015
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Sunny Leones cameraman

Positive thought of the day Whenever in
life you are losing self control.
just think of Sunny Leones cameraman

 

Uploaded By: Neeta Jun,3 2015
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Tomorrow night

One of the girls Facebook status is
Bang Bang tomorrow night. Damn Excited.
Damn confusing?

Uploaded By: Liza Jun,3 2015
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Sheela Bhi Jawaan Ho Gai

Ab padhai mushkil hi nhi
namumkin ho gayi…Kyunki.

pehele to sirf munni
badnaam thi..
aur ab sheela bhi jawan
ho gayi…

Uploaded By: Mahesh Babu May,26 2015
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Rakhi Sawant Satsang Kendra

Top 5 funny shops :-

1. Mallika Textiles,
2. Salman Marriage Beureau.
3. Dolly Bindra Fitness center.
4. Dharmendra Dance
School.
5. Rakhi Sawant Satsang
Kendra.

Uploaded By: Raj May,26 2015
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Vidhya Baalan Ko hi Bula lete

Film Director Malika Sherawat Ko Suhagraat Ke Scene Ke Bare Mein Samjhata Hai.

Film Director: “Suhagraat Ka Scene Hai Aap Hero Ko Doodh Ka Glass Dengi?”

Mallika: “Huh, Glass Se Hi Pilana Thha To Vidya Balan Ko Le Lete… Mujhe Kyun Liya“

May,26 2015
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Dixit Ask

That Awkward Moment For Sunny Loene, When Madhuri Dixit Asks To Sunny Loene - Kya Aap Oral-B Kartey Hain

Uploaded By: Raj May,2 2015
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Marathi movie

Sunny Loene is going to act in marathi movie....
and the name of the film will be 'Suckubai'

Uploaded By: Liza May,2 2015
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Polar bear

Next version of Fair & Lovely ad will show Yami Gautam becoming polar bear

Uploaded By: Priya May,2 2015
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Nhi karegi

Sonam kapoor : :/
Mere balls ki ma bahen karne valo
janta Tumhe maaf nhi karegi

Uploaded By: Nikki May,2 2015
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Kaise lagaye

Ayesha Takia: Bhaiyya, tarbooz kaise lagaye?
Bhaiyya: Wahi main aapse puchna chahta tha.

Uploaded By: Admin May,2 2015
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They Both

Whats The Similarity Between Sunny Deol And Sunny L.eone???

They Both Shout A Lot In Their Movies…

Uploaded By: Santhosh May,2 2015
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DID Me

Mahesh Bhaat: Vote Dene Chale..

Alia Bhaat: Papa Aap Miss Call Karke Bhi Vote De Sakthe Hai, Maine Kal DID Me Dekha Tha..!!

Uploaded By: Farhan May,2 2015
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AAGEY TUMHAREEEY

A song dedicated to sonam kapoor
" suno na sangemarmar ki yeh minaare,
KUCH BHI NAHI AAGEY TUMHAARE"
AAGEY TUMHAREEEY

Uploaded By: Shilpa May,2 2015
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Jaise masala

Maggie ke sath jaise masala aata hai waise hi
Akshay ke saath Sonakshi aati hai

Uploaded By: Abhishek May,2 2015
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Inni Sajj-Dhajj

Pooja Bhatt: Inni Sajj-Dhajj Ke Kyun Bethi Ho..?
Alia Bhatt: Koi Aaraha Hai..
Pooja Bhatt: Kon..?
Alia Bhatt: Acche Din

Uploaded By: Varun May,2 2015
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