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Finaly hamara break up ho gaya hai......
Me&my
Books
Qki
Ham ek doosre ko samajh nahi paye
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School life me dost bahut kamine hote the,but
Aaj pta chala ki dost bhale hi kamine the par ronak unhe se thi.........
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Techer:- Homework kyu nahi kiya?
Student:- TV Dekh Raha Tha... Mood Nahi Tha...
Teacher
Slap) Batamiz muh pe jawab deta hai?
Student:-Kyu Sach ka Sabak sikhaye....
jab sach sun bhi na paye....
Sach koi bole to tu Niyam Kanun bataye...
Tera dar,
Tera pyar,
Teri wah,
Tu hi Rakh,
Rakh Saali......
SADDA HAq AitHe RakH....
SADDA HAq AitHe RakH....
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Bacha: Miss Main Apko kaisa lagta hoon?
Miss: soooo sweet
Bacha: To phir Main Apne parents ko Aap ke Gharkab Bhejun?
Miss: wo kyun?
Bacha: Ta k wo Humari Baat Karain
... Miss: kya Bakwas hai?
.
.
.
Bacha: Tution parhney ke liye…
Miss Aap bhi na T.V dekh dekh ke kharaab ho gai hain.:
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Universal truth we learnt:
"Sun rises in the east".
Fact:
"Sun neither rises nor sets, only earth rotates..!"
Moral:-
"Education ruins us!!!"
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Ye Exam Ke Rishte Bhi Ajib Hote He
Sab Apne Apne Nasib Hote He
Rehte He Jo
Nigaho Se Dur
Saale Wahi Question Compulsory Hote He..
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Mohabbatein ENGINEERING version
1 student tha deewana sa,
1subject pe wo marta tha,
books uthakar, chasma lagakar,
library se gujra krta tha,
kuch padhna tha shayad usko,
jaane kisse darta tha,
jab bhi milta tha mujhse pucha krta tha ,
ye pass kaise haota h yaar,
ye paass kaise hota h yaar,
or main bas ye keh pata tha
KITABEIN KHULI YA HO BAND
PADHNA LAST NIGHT KO HI HOTA HAI,
KAISE KAHO MAIN O YAARA YE PASSAISE HI HOTA H.
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WHAT I LEARNED DURING CLASSES IN SCHOOL :
How to yawn without opening mouth. .
How to sleep with eyes open. .
How to text without looking at the cell phone. .
How to eat lunch without moving mouth. .
How to pretend that we are understandingeach and every word of teachers. . !!
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Teacher: 1 Book + 1 Book ?
Student: 2 Books
.
Teacher: 2 Books + 2 Books ?
Student: 4 Books
... Teacher: (now i'll ask U a tough 1)!
61,789,365 Books + 23,678,989 Books ?? :x
..
..
..
..
..
..
Student: ..LIBRARY
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The Most difficult task for a
student is......?
1) Waiting for the lecture to end
2) Stop laughing at teacher...
3) Controlling sleep in class
4) Attending class without
bunking
5) Studying
6) All of the above
7) To behave like a student :E
To reach class before
attendance :-l
9) To bear a dumb teacher :/
10) To tackle crazy teachers..!
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Miss (school me)- jo bachha hame 1 se 10 tk ginti sunayega use hm hath par ek kiss denge,aur jo 100 tk sunayega use gaal par 2 kiss denge.
Ek bachha bola- miss tb to bistar laga lo.
Miss- kyo?
Bachha- hame to puri book yad h.
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Teacher- There is a Frog Ship is sinking Onion cost RS. 3/kg then what is my age? Student-32yr Teacher-How do u know? Student- Well.. my sister is 16yr old n she is half MAD!
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Teacher: Bachho Mai 1 kavita kehta hu tum puri krna.. Bundele harbolo k muh hmne suni kahani thi, khub ladi mardani Wo to ….? Student: SHILA ki JAWANi
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shq ke school me naya mahoul taiyar ho gaya, Pappu ki GF se puri class ko pyar ho gaya, Bas tabhi se pappu udas ho gaya, Puri class fail or Pappu pas ho gaya!
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Pappu ki master se hui ladai Mastr ne ki pappu ki dhulai Pappu ka grm hua khoon Gaya kabristan aur kabr pe master ke photo tang k likh diya COMING Soon
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Fees maafi ke liye Application:
Sir,mere Dad ne mujhe fees k liye 2000 rupe Diye the, 500 film dekhne me, 500 drink me, 500 ka girlfrind par fir usko 250 ki coffee pilai, aur bache 250 english wali mam pe shart har gaya… Mein samjhta tha ki unka sirf maths ke sir ke saath chakkar hai par unka to aapse bhi chakar nikla, ab aapke paas 2 hi raste haia… Ya to meri fees maaf ya aapka pardafaash.. Asha karta hun meri fees maaf ho jayegi… Aapka pyara Vidyarthi.. Chappal Chor Das .
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Studnt ke dilo ki awaz: Zindgi ka rukh mod dnge, Sari bandise tod dnge Ye Semester….. Jese-tese nikl jaye, Next Semester me to pakka record tod denge!
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Teacher: Galti hone pe maafi magne wale ko kya kahte hai? Stud: Samajhdar Teacher: Aur galti na hone pe bhi mafi mangne waale ko kya kahte hai? Stud: BOYFRIEND
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Father to his son- How was the paper? Son- bas pehla sawal chut gaya. Father- acha,aur baki? Son- 3rd mujhe ata nahi tha, 4th main karna bhul gya, 5th mujhe nazar nahi aya nd 6th paper ki pichli taraf tha meine dekha nahi. Father gusse me bola- aur 2nd ques? Son- bas sirf wahi galat hua hai!
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Kya Hai Zindagi- Dekho To Khwab Hai Zindgi Padho To Kitab Hai Zindgi, Suno To Gyan Hai Zindgi, Par Hum Ye Kehte Hai “Haste Raho” To Aasan Hai ZindGI.
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Human brain is the most outstanding object in world. It functions 24hrs a day, 365days a year. It functions right from the time we are born, and stop only when we enter the examination hall.
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The powers of mind r like the rays of d sun dissipated. When they r concentrated they illuminate". Moral: dont concentrate too much, it wil burn ur books
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Exams r here, at d paper we stare d ans r no where, which maks us pull our hair.. d teachrs glare, And grades r below fair, but just like the past 16 yrs, . WE DONT CARE!!!!!
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If in examination hall during d exam u feel tht d paper is tough, dont worry. Just close ur eyes, take a deep breath n say 2 urself"Dis is a very interesting subject. I want to study it one more year"
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What is FEAR ? ? . FEAR is that deep, wrenching feeling when pages of your book still smell new and d exam is just 1 day away!!
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A first bench student knows"TO AVOID THE PROBLEMS"But only the last bench students has the ability to"FACE THE PROBLEM"
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Kagaz ki kashti thi, Pani ka kinara tha! Khel ki masti thi, DIL ye awara tha! Kaha aa gaye is Samajdari ki Duniya me, Wo School ka Bachpana hi pyara tha!
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As i hv startd studyin seriously 4 exams n i hv decided not 2 msg any mor so i believe u ppl wil cooperate wid me.Thanx.. . - Height of over acting-
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School life's done..Try remembering the SMILING FACES of your friends..Remember the times spent TOGETHER..What do you FEEL? Started missing everyone a lot.
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PLEDGE collge boys: . India is my nation Girls are my destination Dating is my occupation Sighting is my profession In between, wat the hell is dis Education .
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Har sawal se dat kar ladna Fekne me kami mat karna Mauka mile to piche b dekhna Aur ek baat yaad rakhna Aage wale k paper APNA Hi samajhna BEST OF LUCK $!!
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Cricket has reached exciting levels with T20. Infusing the same thing into exams, some suggestions: 1.Reduce exam time by 1 hr n marks by 50 2.Introduce strategic breaks after each 30 mins 3.Give free hit marks where students can frame their own questions n write ans 4.Ist 15 mins power play
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Midnite coffee long chats B'day bumps bunking classes crush on sum1 fight 4 marks just everything. People call it 'COLLEGE' I call it, . . . 'COOL AGE. (COLLEGE).
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A boy came running 2 d lecture hall. BOY:terrorists hav kidnapped all our lecturers nd hav demanded 50 lakhs 2 release them or else they will burn them alive..so pls donate... i hav already donated 10 litres kerosene..
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Cheating in xams is d best xercise 4 ur reflexes.. . 1. Ur eyes roll 2 c d answer sheet of ur seat-mate . 2. Ur ears bcom sensitive, even 2 d softest whispers 2 get wat ur seatmate says . 3. Ur neck stretches either ways 2 search 4 clues . 4. Ur hand copies d answer faster dan ever
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Collage related movies. Exams- WELCOME Claas-DHOOM Q.paper- RAAZ Copy-MAJBOOR Marks-nayak Final exam-MURDER Fail-YE TO HONA HI THA Paas-CHAMATKAR.
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LAST ball 6, LAST ball wkt, LAST min goal, . often wins the game, . dats why studnts are still confident dat LAST day study can win an exam 4 them! .
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Abraham lincoln: if i hv 8hrs 2cut a tree, i spend 7hrs in sharpening d axe! . gr8 STUDENTS: If V hv 8 hrs 2study, V spend 7hrs in searching the books! .
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1000'S oF YeArS HaV PaSsd, MiLLoNs oF ToMoRoWs WiL CoMe, BuT sTiLL, HoPe S aLiVe iN aLL sTudNTs- . . . . . . . . ."ToMoRoW i WiL deFiNiTLy sTaRT.
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There are 3 kinds of students:
1.Some make wonders happen.
2.Some see wonders happen.
3.Others wonder what happened...
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some times we fail to understand the feelings of very close people in our life..
bcoz, a book held very near to eyesis very difficult to read!
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Itni siddat se book uthane ki koshis ki hai,ki har jarre ne mujhe sulane ki sajhis ki hai,
kahte hain agar kisi chapter ko pure man se padho to puri kayanat tumhe confuse karne mein lag jati hai,
agar aisa nahin hai to chapter syllabus k bahar hai mere dost.
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S'mall angry,
S'illy fights,
S'imple sms,
S'erious jokes,
S'ensitive feelings,
S'enseless speak, mixture of all the above S
is our Classroom
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A Belated Teachers' Day
Its A Humble Request
"80% Of Teachers r
Suffering From Throat
Pain By Teaching Students."
So Plz
.
.
.
.
BUNK d Classes As Much
As Possible
n
Save Our Teachers
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A good teacher according to students is 1 who :
-Should Be Absent At Least 3 Times A Week
-Should Come In Class 10mins Late And Left The Class 10 Mins Earlier
-Should Not Give Any Homework And Assignments
-Should Not Ask Any Questions To Students
-Should Not Disturb The StudentsBy Teaching While They Are Talking
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SILENCE
Is d best Answer
for all questions
SMILE
Is d best Reaction
in all situations
Unfortunately
BOTH Never Help In
any EXAM, VIVA, REVIEW & INTERVIEW
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Na wqt h itna k sylbus pura kiya jae
na tarkib koi k xam pas kiya jae
aisa dard diya h is padhai ne
na khul k roya jae na jam k soya jae.
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Principle :All students must try to get above 96%
Student: No maam we will try for100%.
Principle: Are you joking
Student:who started joking first
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Education related songs:
SCHOOL- Apni to paatshala masti ki pathshala
TUTION- Idhar chala mai udhar chala
...
MATHS- Ajeeb dastan hai yeh
SCIENCE- Aa khusi se kudkushi karle
GEOGRAPHY- Musafir hoon main yaaro
ECONOMICS-Kyu paisa paisa karti hai,paise pe kyu tu marti hai
EXAM- Zehrelein raatey ninde udd jati hai
RESULT- Jiya dharak dharak
PASS- Aaj mai upar asman niche
FAIL- Jag suna suna lage.
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Answers in Exams by non medical
student- LOL
1. Antibody - One who hates his
body .
2. Artery - Study of Fine Paintings.
3. Bacteria - Back door of a
Cafeteria .
4. Coma - Punctuation Mark .
5. Gall Bladder - Bladder of a Girl .
6. Genes - Blue Denim.
7. Labour Pain - Hurt at Work .
8. Liposuction - A French Kiss .
9. Ultrasound - Radical Sound .
10. Cardiology - Advanced Study of
Playing Cards .!
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