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Taxi Ke

Santa : Yaar aaj mein bus ke peeche peecha daudkar 15 rupees bacha liye.
Banta : Kya yaar, tum to bahut murkh ho, agar taxi ke peeche bhagte to 150 rupees bachta!

Uploaded By: Rehan Jul,20 2015
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Setting Kar Le

Beta: Papa apki shaadi ho gayi?
Papa: Haan.
Beta: Kis se hui?
Papa: Bewkuf teri mummy se.
Beta: Wah papa ghar me hi setting kar li.

Uploaded By: Abhishek Jul,27 2015
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Mobile Ki Pooja

Apne mobile ko facewash lagakar..
Garam pani se dokar use kumkum aur..
chawal lagakar mandir mey chadaa do..
Kyu ki SMS toh Ap karte nahi..
Toh puja karo!!!

Uploaded By: Aisha Jun,24 2015
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Gamo ko Bhulana

Kafi hai husn dil ko behlane ke liye,
Mohabbat karlo dil ko dukhane ke liye,
Chahe bhale pade gam se vasta,
Ek hum jaisa dost rakhna sab gamo ko bhulane ke liye…

Uploaded By: Santhosh Jun,24 2015
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Johnny Stands Up

Teacher: Anyone who thinks he is stupid may stand up.
Nobody stands up.
Teacher: Im sure there are some stupid students over here.
Little Johnny stands up.
Teacher: Ohh, Johnny you think you are stupid?
Little Johnny: No, i just feel bad that you are standing alone.

Uploaded By: Sneha Aug,20 2015
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No Madam

Lady: Is this my train?
Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady: Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master: No Madam, I’m Afraid it’s too heavy.

Uploaded By: Chameli Aug,17 2015
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Shravan Main

Santa roti ka 1 tukda khud kha raha tha aur 1 pass baithi murgi ko khila raha tha.
Banta: Ye kya kar raha hai?
Santa: Chicken ke sath roti kha raha hu.
Shravan chal rahe hain na.

Uploaded By: Mahesh Babu Aug,31 2015
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फिल्म देखने मॉल गया

फिल्म देखने मॉल गया वहाँ टिकट के लिए लंबी लाइन लगी हुई थी.
मै चिल्लाया अल्लाह हू अकबर और अपना बैग फेंक दिया
अब मैं लाइन में अकेला हूँ

Uploaded By: Farhan Jul,13 2016
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Talented Student

Kehdo un parhne walon se,
Kabhi hum bhi parha kertay thay,
Jitna syllabus parh k wo top kertay hain,
Utna to hum choice per chor dia kertay thay…

Uploaded By: Rahul Jun,24 2015
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True Love

Jab Se Hua hai…..
Jab Se Hua Hai Woh Khawab Ki Tarah....
Zindagi Guzar Rahi Hai Azaab Ki Tarah…
Khushbu Ky Kalam Se Shayad Likha Tha Usne....
Har Lafz Mahak Raha Hai Gulab Ki Tarah…..

Uploaded By: Angel Jun,24 2015
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Bathroom Ki Light

Chota baby: mummy raat ko jab me susu karne gaya
to bathroom Ki light jal gayi,
Mummy: haramjade tu aaj fir freeze me susu kar aaya.

Uploaded By: Mariya Oct,29 2015
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Pana Khona

Dosti me sab yaad nahi rahte Kuch ko bhulaana bhi Padta hai.
Ishq me sab hasil nahi hota kuch Gavaana bhi padta hai…

Uploaded By: Priya Jun,24 2015
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Dighlight Dekhuga

In A cricket ground.. Security:Cricket match is over now,why r u stil sitting?
SardaR koi baat nahi highlight dekhuga

Uploaded By: Sunny Aug,1 2015
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Tumhara Result

Police Wala Apne Bache Se: Beta Tumhara Result Acha Nahi Aya Aj Se Tumhara Khelna T.V Dekhna Band.
Bacha: Ye 50 Rs Pakdo Or Is Bat Ko Yahi Daba Do.

Uploaded By: Savita Aug,5 2015
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Sidhi Nai Bani

Santa:Tum Kitne Saal se Jalebi Bana Rahe Ho?Halwai:30 Saal Se..!
Santa:Badi Sharm Ki Bat heTumse Aaj Tak Jalebi Sidhi Nai Bani..

Uploaded By: Santi Aug,1 2015
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Toilet Please

Boy: “Can I go to the toilet please?”
Teacher: “Say your alphabet.”
Boy: “abcd efgh ijkl mnoq rstu vwxy z”
Teacher: “You forgot about the p.”
Boy: “The p whent down my pants.”

Uploaded By: Aakash Jul,14 2015
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As A Friend

Boy: I like u.
Girl: Hahahaha
Boy: I am serious.
Girl: I like u too but as a friend.
Boy: Bt i really like u. I love u.
Girl: I love u too but as a friend.

Uploaded By: Pankaj Nov,9 2015
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Smart Husband

Wife TV par match dekh rahi thi,
Husband smart banke aya or bola,
DARLING MEIN KAISA LAG RAHA HU?
Tabhi wife zorse chillayi CHAKKAAAA.

Uploaded By: Karan Nov,24 2015
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Alone.....

Hum Roothe To Kiske Bharose,
Kaun Hai Jo Aayega Hume Manane Ke Liye,
Ho Sakta Hai Taras Aa Bhi Jaye Aapko,
Par Dil Kahan Se Laaun Aapse Ruth Jane Ke Liye…

Uploaded By: Priya Jun,24 2015
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Ankhon Ka Dard

Mujhko Mere Chahane Wale Hi Na Samjh Sake,
Aankoon Mein Chupa Dard Ankahi Dastaan Hun Mein To,
Her Kisi Ki Koi Na Koi Manjil Zarur Hoti Hai,
Jiski Koi Manjil Nahi Wo Raasta Hun Mein To…

Uploaded By: Mahesh Babu Jun,24 2015
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Dekhne Layak

Wife: Tum kal padosan ke sath movie dekhne gaye the?
Husband: Kya karu tum to janti hi ho,
Aajkal family ke sath dekhne layak,
Film banti hi kahan hai.

Uploaded By: Rajaan Nov,20 2015
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funny...

Kya kare in pyare dosto ka
jo dhire dhire hume bhula rahe hain
kabhi kiya karte the dhero msg
aj ek ek paise apni shadi k liye bacha rahe hain…

Uploaded By: Sunny Jun,24 2015
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Aapka Noor

Wo kahte hain ke saari raat aap hume sone nahi dete.............
hum kehte hai ke aapka noor hee aisa hai ke aap hamari raat hone he nahi dete…

Uploaded By: Julie Jun,24 2015
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An Umbrella

Master: Why didn’t you water the plants yesterday
Servant: It was raining.
Master: Don’t make excuses! You could have used an umbrella

Uploaded By: Rahul Aug,17 2015
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Uploaded By: Munni Dec,28 2016
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Wapas Nahi Aaye

1 ladki Santa Inspector se: Sir, mere pati 5 din pahle
aalu lene Market gaye the, abhi tak wapas nahi aaye hai
Santa: To tum kuch aur kyo nahi bana leti.

Uploaded By: Santi Nov,17 2015
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Uploaded By: Karan Dec,28 2016
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GirlFriend Poch Le

Boht Mushkil Ho Jata Hai Us Waqt Jawab Dena ae DOSTO
Jab Banda Bathroom Me Ho Or Girl Friend Poch Le Janu Kya Kar Rahe Ho?

Uploaded By: Roopa Dec,2 2015
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Make You Papa

Did God make you, Papa?”
Yep! He certainly did.”
And did He make me too?”
Of course, He did.”
Well, He’s certainly doing better as He goes along, isn’t He?”

Uploaded By: Neeta Jul,14 2015
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Marriage Bureau

Sardar Ji: Hamne Mobile Marriage Bureau shuru kiya hai,Rishtey k liye 1 dabaye, Mangni k liye 2 dabye, Shadi k liye 3 dabye.
Man: Hum Dusri Shadi k liye kya dabaun?
Sardar Ji: Dusri shadi k liye pehle wali ka gala dabye.

Uploaded By: Gujju Aug,19 2015
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Uploaded By: Poonam Jan,5 2017
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True Friendship

Raatein gumnam hoti hai,
Din kisike naam hota hai,
Hum zindagi kuch is tarah jite hai,
Ki har lamha sirf doston ke hi naam hota hai…

Uploaded By: Liza Jun,24 2015
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Shaadi Femail Se

N English man says america me,
Shaadi e-mail se hoti hai.
Our sardar ji says india me to,
Shaadi fe-mail se hoti hai.

Uploaded By: Santi Jul,17 2015
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Uploaded By: Neeta Jan,5 2017
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Miss call

Raja or Rani ne fix kiya ki ab baat Mobile se nhi Kabutar se karenge.
1 Din Rani ne bina khat k kabutar uda diya.Raja bola:
Ye kya?
Rani boli miss call yaar.

Uploaded By: Aisha Jul,27 2015
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Dopahar Ka Waqt

Dopahar ka waqt hai, billi chat par soyi hai..
Waaah Waah….Dopahar ka waqt hai, billi chat par syi hai….
Daya Pata Lagao, khuni Inme se Koi Hai…

Uploaded By: Gujju Jul,16 2015
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Dopahar Ka Waqt

Dopahar ka waqt hai, billi chat par soyi hai..
Waaah Waah….Dopahar ka waqt hai, billi chat par syi hai….
Daya Pata Lagao, khuni Inme se Koi Hai…

Uploaded By: Gujju Jul,16 2015
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मस्त मस्त माल है

तेरा चला जाना ही सही था
वर्ना पता ही नहीं चलता दुनिया में इतने मस्त मस्त माल है

Uploaded By: Sachin Rana Jul,14 2016
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Hamne Zara Si

Ram Ne Dhanush Toda Sita Dauri Chali Aayi. Krishn Ne Murali Bajai,
Radha Dauri Chali Aayi. Hamne Zara Si Siti Kya Bajai, Wo Apne Baap Ko Le Aayi.

Uploaded By: Viraj Feb,5 2016
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आज उन लोगो को बैंक के बाहर लंबी लाइन

Uploaded By: Varun Nov,11 2016
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नौबत ही नहीं आती

पत्नी : अगर तुम अकल से काम करते तो हर महीने इतनी बचत करते कि,
मेरे लिये कम से कम 2 साडि़याँ खरीद लेते
पति : अगर में अकल से काम लेता तो
मुझे साडियाँ खरीदने की नौबत ही नहीं आती

Uploaded By: Karan Jun,7 2016
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Star Plus का असर है

Uploaded By: Neeta Oct,19 2016
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BSNL का कार्ड डलवाया हूँ

एक बिहारी के पीछे.कुत्ते का बच्चा पड़ गया...
बिहारी भागते हुए चिल्लाया हम तो BSNL का कार्ड डलवाया हूँ.
ई ससुरा Vodafone का नेटवर्क कैसे पकड़ रहा है

Uploaded By: Tia Sep,9 2016
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प्लीज मेरी तरफ

प्लीज मेरी तरफ मुह करके सो जाओ.. मुझे डर लग रहा हे.
हस्बैंड: अच्छा. बस अपनी ही चिंन्ता हे.
मे भले ही डर डर के मर जाऊँ

Uploaded By: Aisha Feb,6 2016
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Break Up With Her

Friend1: Why Do You Break Up With Her
Friend2: Mujhe Kutta Kutta Kahti Thi Or Apne Kutte
Ko BABU.

Uploaded By: Farhan Jan,14 2016
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सोमवार के व्रत शुरू कर दे

ये इशक करना छोड दिया यारो
वरना हम तो आज भी पलट के देख ले तो
लडकियाँ सोमवार के व्रत शुरू कर दे!

Uploaded By: Munni Oct,25 2016
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Ladkiya Bewkoof Hoti Hai

Ek Newspaper Me Chhapa Ki: 50% Ladkiya Bewkoof Hoti Hai
Is Baat Par Ladkiyo Ne Khub Halla Machaya...
Fir Next Day Jab Ye Chapa Ke 50% Ladkiya Bewkoof Nahi Hoti.
Tab Jakar Ladkiya Shant Hui.

Uploaded By: Poonam Mar,10 2016
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गांधीजी की सजा

एक आदमी मरने के बाद यमराज के पास जाता है।
वहां देखता है… गांधीजी शकीरा के साथ डांस कर रहे है।
आदमी यमराज से पूछता है: गांधीजी की सजा इतनी मस्त क्यों
यमराज: हरामखोर सजा गांधीजी को नहीं शकीरा को मिली है

Uploaded By: Julia Jun,9 2016
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बैठने के लिये

माँ : सोफा लेटने के लिये नहीं बैठने के लिये होता है बेटा
बेटा : हा तो चप्पल भी मारने के लिये नही पहनने के लिये होती है

Uploaded By: Sophia Jun,27 2016
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PETER DOES NOT FLIRT

Grammar Teacher: PETER DOES NOT FLIRT WITH WOMEN.
What is PETER in the sentence.
Student: Maam, PETER is gay.

Uploaded By: Liza May,11 2016
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