नाग नागिन से बोला: मेरा दिल तेरे प्यार मैं अँधा है...
नागिन बोली: मेरा ख्याल छोड़ दे मेरा बॉयफ्रेंड एनाकोंडा है
Ek Student Dusre Se
Aaj Kuch Khatarnak Kaam Karne Ka Mann Kar Raha Hai,
Jo Pehle Hum Ne Na Kia Ho
2nd Student : To Phir Chal Thora sa Padh Le
इश्क के समंदर में गोता लगाया… वाह वाह…
पर पानी बहुत ठंडा था इसलिए बाहर निकल आया.
अनुष्का : मुझे कोहली से मिलना है
धोनी : ऐ बाई 3 अप्रैल तक रुक जा
कप जीत लेने दो
SBI : Please Return Your Loan Amount
Vijay Mallya : Abhi Lunch Hai, Baad Me Aana
Aapki 1 Baat Hame Bahut Pasand Hai,
Aap Jab Bhi Kam Karte Hai,
Dil Lagake Karte Hai. Qki
Dimag Ka OPTION To Aapke Pas Hai Hi Nai
पति: क्या बात है. आज घर बड़ा साफ है
क्या वॉट्सएप बंद है तुम्हारा,
पत्नी: नहीं वह तो चार्जर नहीं मिल रहा था तो
ढूंढ़ने के चक्कर में सफाई हो गई
Ek Din Santa Ne Apni Premika ko Himmat Jutakar Keh Dala I love you.
Premika Gusse se : Jara Pyar Se Nahi Keh Sakte,
Santa : I love you Didi.
Boy : Whats Your Name
Girl : Dhara.
Boy : Kaunsi, 144 ya 145
नवाज : मोदीजी, दिल्ली जाते समय लाहौर में प्लेन उतार लेना
मोदी : क्यों बे
नवाज : जन्मदिन है, आप आओगे तो दोस्तों पे रौब जामेगा
मोदी:पाय लागू माताजी
नवाज की माँ: उड़ता रह बेटा
Gadha or Husband Ke Bich Kaya Differene Hai
Answer : Husband Gadha Ban Sakta Hai
But.. Gadha Itnaaaa Bhi Gadhaaa Nahhhhi Kee Husband Ban Jaye.
Ek Bhikari Bhagwan Ko He Bhagwan,
Muje Khane Ke Liye Aisa Kuch Do
Jo Khane Par Bhi Khatam Na Ho
Bhagwan Ye Lo Beta CHINGAM
You Always Stop And Stare, Why Not Just Take A Picture
Tuta Hua Phul Khushbu De Jata H,
Bita Hua Pal Yaade De Jata H,
Har Shakhs Ka Apna Andaz Hota H,
Koi Zindgi Mein Pyaar.
Arz hai.. Pink Lips Are The Girls Beauty,
Wah Wah
Pink Lips Are The Girls Beauty,
Wah Wah
And Kissing Them Is The Boys Duty'
Love Is Like Peeing Your Pants Everyone Can See It
But Only You Can Feel It. Thanks For Being The Pee In My Pants.
कल तो पड़ोसन फुल Mood में थी...
बोली जो मांगना हो मांग लो..
साला मैंने भी मौके का फायदा उठा के
Wifi का Password मांग लिया.
Tujse Hi Har Subha Ho Meri,
Tujse Hi Har Sham,
Kuch Aisa Rishta Ban Gaya Tujhse,
Ki Har Saaso Mein Sirf Tera Hi Naam.
Tujse hi har subha ho meri,
Tujse hi har sham,
Kuch aisa rishta ban gaya tujhse,
Ki Har saaso mein sirf tera hi naam.
BoyFriend : Intazar Bahut Bhari Cheej Hoti Hai
GirlFriend : Toh Kisi Aur Company Ki Ghari Le lo
Usne rat k andhere me,
Mere hath ki hatheli pe,
Likha tha apni ungli se
Muje Pyar H Tmse,
Jane kesi syahi thi wo,
Ke mitati b nai or dikhti b nhi.
Hamne socha tha har mod par tumhara saath denge,
Hamne socha tha har mod par tumhara saath denge,
Par kya karein kambakhat sadak hi seedhi nikli.
Mujhe khamosh rahon may tera saath chahiye,
Tanha hai mera haath tera haath chahiye,
Junoon e ishq ko teri hi sougaat chahiye,
Mujhey jeene ke liye teri hi saat chahiye.
Nazron se jab nazar ka takrar hota hai,
Har mod par kisi ka intezar hota hai,
Dil rota hai zakham hanste hain,
Kya isi ka naam pyaar hota hai.
Waqt guzrega hum bikhar jayenge,
Kaun jane ke hum kidhar jayenge,
Hum aapki parchhai hain yaad rakhna,
Jahan tanhai mili wahan hum nazar aayenge.
Badi muddat se chaha hai tujhe,
Badi duaon se paya hai tujhe,
Tujhe bhulane ki sochu bhi to kaise,
Kismat ki lakeeron se churaya hai tujhe.
Ladki: Hello baby, tumhari yaad aa rahi thi.
Ladka: Abhi salary nahi aayi hai meri.
Ladki: Acha chalo papa aa gaye, bye.
Kalam thi hath mai likhna sikhaya aapne,
Takat thi hath mai hosla dilaya aapne,
Manzil thi samne rasta dikhaya aapne,
Hum to sirf dost the, Aashiq banaya aapne.
Chupa Loon Is Tarah Tujhe Apni Baahon Mein,
Ki Hawa Bhi Guzarne Ki Izazat Maange,
Ho Jaun Itna Madhosh Tere Ishq Mein,
Ki Hosh Bhi Aane Ki Izazat Manage.
Dekha hai tumhare aage,
Sharma ke phoolon ko murjhaate,
Aye jahan ko ghayal karne waale,
Tum deodorant kyun nahi lagaate.
Chehre pe mere zulfo ko phailao kisi din,
Kyu roz sirf garajate ho, baras jao kisi din,
Khushbu ki tarah guzro mere dil ki gali se,
Phulon ki tarah mujhpe bikhar jao kisi din.
Sardar Dukhi Tha.
Kisi Ne Pucha: Kyu Tension Me Ho?
Sardar: Yaar Ek Dost Ko plastic Surgery K Liye 2 Lakh Diye,
Ab Saale Ko Pehchan Nahi pa raha hu.
Pagal aashiq ho jaate hain pyaar me,
Baaki kasar poori ho jaati hain intezaar me,
Magar yeh fauzi dilruba nahi samajhti,
Gol gappe khaati phirti hain baazar me.
Aahat see koi aaye toh lagta hain kee tum ho,
Saaya saa koi lehraaye toh lagta hain kee tum ho,
Ab tum hee bataao kya tum kisi bhoot sey kam ho?
Raat chup hai magar chand khamosh nahi,
Kaise kahoon aaj phir hosh nahin,
Is tarah dooba hoon teri mohabbat ki gahrai mein,
Hath mein jaam hai aur peena ka hosh nahin.
Tujse hi har subha ho meri,
Tujse hi har sham,
Kuch aisa rishta ban gaya tujhse,
Ki Har saaso mein sirf tera hi naam.
Santa: Yaar answer sheet par sabse pehle kya likhu?
Banta: Yehi ki is answer sheet par likhe gaye sabhi answers kalpnik hain jinka kisi bhi book se koi smbandh nahi hai.
A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja.
Devdas Ko Paaro Ne Na-Kaam Kar Diya,
Sharabi Ko Sharab Ne Badnaam Kar Diya,
Mohabbat Ho Ya Sharab, Dono Ka Asar Dekh Lo,
Devdas Aur Sharabi Ka, Ek Sa Anjaam Kar Diya.
Santa: Wo Ladki Jo Ja Rahi Hai Bahri Hai?
Banta: tujhe Kaise Pata.
Santa: Kal Maine Use I Love You Kaha Tha
To Boli Kal Hi Maine New Sandal Liya Hai.
Har nazar ko ek nazar ki talash hai,
Har chehre mein kuchh to ehsah hai,
Aapse dosti hum yun hi nahi kar baithe,
Kya karen hamari pasand hi kuchh KHAAS hai.
Muskurana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Muskurana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Use jo mohabbat samjhe,
Woh sabse bada gadha hai.
Hum dua karte hain Khuda se,
Ki wo aap jaisa dost aur na banaye,
Ek Cartoon jaisi cheez hai humare paas,
Kahin wo bhi common na ho jaye.
Ek tu teri aawaz yaad aayegi,
Teri kahi huwi har baat yaad aayegi,
Din dhal jayega raat yaad aayegi,
Har lamha pahli mulakat yaad aayegi.
Life Mein 2 Baatein Hamesha Yaad Rakhna.
1. Hawa Chalti He To Patte Hilte Hai.
2. Nahi Chalti, To Nahi Hilte.
Bas Yaar Thanks Mat Bolna, Jab Tak Knowledge Hai, Dete Rahenge.
Kash feeling bhi sms ki tarah hoti,
To aap k GUM hum recieve karte,
Apni KHUSHIYAN aap ko send karte,
Aapki NARAZGI delete karte,
Aur aapki YADON ko save karte.
Mohabbat ka koi rang nahi,
Fir bhi wo rangin hai,
Pyar ka koyi chehra nahi,
Phir bhi woh hasin hai.
A girl comes late to class.
Teacher: Why r u late?
Girl: 1 boy was following me.
Teacher: So what?
Girl: The boy was walking very slowly.
Ladka: shadi ke liye kaon se date rahe?
Ladki: Hichkichate hue, 22 December.
Laka:?
Ladki sharmate hue: suna hai saal ki sabse lambi raat hote hai.