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Whatsapp Funny
Scotch Brite Se

Santa : what are u doing, bro?
Banta : dinner, followed by scotch
Santa : bhai, black label?
Banta : nahi bhai, scotch brite se bartan dho raha hun

Uploaded By: Nikki May,13 2015
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2 Jawab

Ek hi prashna ke 2 jawab..
1)Maa: Ja Red Label le kar aa…
Beta: Aadha Kilo ya 1 Kilo?
2)Papa: Ja Red Label le kar aa…
Beta: Quarter ya half

Uploaded By: Tia May,13 2015
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Mushkile khatam

Biwi ne namaaz padhkar dua ke liye haath uthaye, par kuchh nahin manga aur haath neeche kar liye!
Shauhar yeh sab dekh raha tha, to puchh baitha..
“Yeh kya? Dua kyun nahin maangi?”
Biwi: Maangne hi lagi thi ki “Allah aapki tamaam mushkile khatam kar de”
Phir socha, Kahin main hi na mar jaaun!

Uploaded By: Rehan May,13 2015
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Dimaag kharab

Shaadishuda purusho ke liye…
Q: Maine shaadi kyun ki?
Ans: Dimaag kharab ho gaya tha
Shaadi-Shuda Mahilao ke liye…
Q: Main Patni kyun bani?
Ans: Kisi ka dimaag thikaane lagana tha

Uploaded By: Abhishek May,13 2015
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Chal basaa

Ladkiya Interval mein apne college ke bahar “Dubey Chaat Waale” ke paas jakar boli:
Pehli ladki: Dubey meri chaat..
Dusri ladki: Dubey pehle meri chaat..!
Teesri ladki: Nahin dube, pehle meri chaat nahin to pera period shuru ho jayega!
Dubey saala Khushi ke maare chal basaa!

Uploaded By: Viraj May,13 2015
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Swarg mein

90 saal ke ek dadaji mrityu ke baad swarg pahunche..
Swarg mein khoobsurat apsarao ka nritya dekh kar dada ji fut-fut kar rote hue bole…
“Saala Baba Ramdev ke chakkar mein nahin padta, to kab ka yaha pahunch gaya hota”

Uploaded By: Tia May,13 2015
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kaam zaroori hai

Main: Hello bhai kya haal hai?
Dost: Mast bhai, tu suna?
Main: Yaar ek kaam tha….
Dost: Haan to karle, baad mein baat kar liyo, kaam zaroori hai

Uploaded By: Rehan May,13 2015
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Maggi khayegi

Horror films me Ladki ko ghar me jab kuch
ajeeb sunai deta hai toh woh aise bolti hai…
Kaun hai wahaa??
Jaise ke Bhoot bolega:
Haan main kitchen mein hoon..
Maggi khayegi??

Uploaded By: Munni May,13 2015
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CRAZY FANS

1947 ka mashhoor SMS…
Tab mobile tha kya jo SMS hoga…
Aap log bhi na bas pagal ho jaate ho, mera SMS padhne ke liye!
CRAZY FANS

Uploaded By: Rajaan May,13 2015
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Jeevit rajneta

Rahul Gandhi ekmaatar aise jeevit rajneta hain,
Jo,
Janmdin manane Landon,
Ilaaj karane Newyork,
Baal katwane Spain,
aur ‘Naak’ katwane bharat aate hain!

Uploaded By: Sachin Rana May,13 2015
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Ajeeb mindset

Biviyaa bhi ajeeb mindset rehti hain
Devdas ka Shahrukh inhe “Romantic” lagta hai…
Aur
Pati sharaab piye to “Bewda” lagta hai

Uploaded By: Munni May,13 2015
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Mind It

Don’t worry guys, everything is fine.
My phone was on vibration. Uski wajah se earthquake aa raha tha..!!
Settings changed now.
Sorry for the inconvenience caused.
From :- Rajnikant
Mind It!

Uploaded By: Santi May,13 2015
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Hotel mein

EK bhikhari ko 100/- ka note mila..
Wo five star hotel mein gaya aur bharpet khana khaya
3000/- ka bill aaya…
woh Manager se bola: Paise nahin hain..
Manager ne use police ke hawale kar diya..
Bhikhari ne police ko 100/- diye aur chhoot gaya!!
Isko bolte hain..
Financial Management without MBA in India

Uploaded By: Raj May,13 2015
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मेरी गली मे

वो बोली मेरी गली मे ना आया कर मेरे भाई
पकड़ लेंगे तेरे को,
में बोला- मुझे कभी Temple_Run वाला
बंदर नहीं पकड़ सका तेरे भाई क्या चीज़ है

Uploaded By: Sanjjana May,13 2015
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From IIN

Boys goes to cyber cafe..
Boy-भैया रिजल्ट चेक करना है
He-रोल न. बताओ
Boy-971611××××
He- ये कहा का रोल न. है
Boy-IIN का i m frm IIN

Uploaded By: Liza May,13 2015
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Chicken Mei Onian

2 Pandito me ladai ho rahi thi bahut der ho gai-
toh tisre-pandit ne pucha kya hua?
toh 1 pandit bola jab me LEHSUN PYAZ nahi khata toh is sale ne chicken me dala kyu! 

Uploaded By: Roopa May,12 2015
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Dress Cost

Girl- Is dress ki kia keemat hay..
Shopkeeper- 5 kiss
Girl- Or us dress ki kia keemat hay
Shopkeeper- 10 kiss
Girl- ok dono dreses pack kardo

Uploaded By: Abhishek May,12 2015
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BEST FRIEND

A Lover Gives Love,
A Father Gives Protection,
A Mother Gives Life,
But
A BEST FRND gives,
A BEAUTIFUL Gals Mob No.
Prove ur Frndship
M waiting Dost

Uploaded By: Chameli May,11 2015
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Gile shikwe

Gile shikwe dil se na lagana,
kbhi maan jana to kbhi manana,
kl ka kya pta hm ho ya na ho,
isliye jb b mauka mile,
Kbhi pizza khila dena,
kbhi coffee pilla dena 

Uploaded By: Shilpa May,11 2015
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Smiling

Let me guess what ur doing
Reading book?
Na Na

Listening Music
Uhu

Watching TV
Nah

Caught U!
Missing me & reading my SMS na!
Oh now ur smiling 

Uploaded By: Sneha May,11 2015
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Bun-KING

Teacher: Can u tel the name of 3 great kings who have brought happiness & peace into student’s lives?

Stud:
Smo-KING
Drin-KING
&
Bun-KING

Uploaded By: Jessie May,11 2015
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Feel Lazy

A very naughty ans given by a girl..
When asked
“How u feel when a guys give a flying kiss”

Girl- i feel boy r very lazy.. 
let have fun boys!

Uploaded By: Angel May,11 2015
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Bachpan me her ladke ki zindagi mein 2 hadse zarur hote he

1st- Medam per dil aana
2nd- Pent ki zip me nunnu fasna!
Hass kya rahe ho
Nahi fasi thi kya

Uploaded By: Priya May,11 2015
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HADDIYA todo

Zindgi me Hmesha 1 Baat YAAD Rakho
Kbhi kisi ka
Dil
nhi todna chahye.
Qk
DiL 1 hi hota hai

Todna hi h to uski
HADDIYA
todo 206 hoti he

Uploaded By: Aisha May,11 2015
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Friendship Rules

Friendship Rules,
No Attitude, Excuse, Sorry, Thanks
Dont Say Im Busy!
Just Always Say!
Yar Hukum Ker Tere Liye Jan B Hazir Hai
bus Koi Kaam Na Kehna

Uploaded By: Sanjjana May,11 2015
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Smart Lovely

Duniya me 2 tarha ke log hote hai
Smart
Lovely
Smart: Wo hai jisne Apko ye msg send kiya hai.
Aur
Lovely: Wo hai jiska Aap msg padh
rahen hai…

Uploaded By: Tina May,11 2015
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Rango se zyada

Rangeen ho tum Rango se zyada,
Mehkte ho tum Phulo se zyada,
Smart ho tum Mujhse zyada Agar ye sochte ho tum to.
‘Bewkoof ‘ ho tum had se zyada 

Uploaded By: Varun May,11 2015
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ULTI aa jati hai

CHIPKALI ko ubaal kr dhoop me sukha kr
chips jaisa Crunchi hone k baad

Ketchup uper daal kr khaya jaye to…

.

.

suna hai…

ULTI aa jati hai 

Uploaded By: Farhan May,11 2015
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Night today

Can we do romance in the Mid Night today…
I’m in a good mood…
Just a little bit of kiss n biting…
Reply me soon…
Ur loving mosquito

Uploaded By: Aakash May,11 2015
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GET LOST

The most romantic lines:
Main kho gaya hu tumhare pyaar me tum bhi kho jao..

If translated in English it becomes:
“I am lost in ur love, u also GET LOST”

Uploaded By: Shilpa May,11 2015
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Achhe hum he

Agar koi hume achha lagta he to
Acha wo nahi
Achhe hum he
&
Ager koi hme bura lagta he to
Jaan lo ki
Bura wohi he Qki
Hum to achhe he na…
So nvr mind dost..

Uploaded By: Santhosh May,11 2015
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Suno Ji

This PJ will blow u,
Who was the 1st indian to use 4G?

Its not Rajnikanth all the time.

Ans: Anil Kapor
aG..oG..loG..sunoG..(4G)

Uploaded By: Raj May,11 2015
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Shila Ki Jawani

Teacher: Bachho Mai 1 kavita kehta hu tum puri krna..
Bundele harbolo k muh hmne suni kahani thi,
khub ladi mardani Wo to ….?
Student: SHILA ki JAWANI thi :p

Uploaded By: Chameli May,11 2015
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Something Sweet

Something Sweet:-

Girl- What is the proof that u miss me!

Boy- See my cheeks..
My mamma slapped me..
Bcoz i was smiling while sleeping..
Thinking of U

Uploaded By: Rahul May,11 2015
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GIRL’S T SHIRT

MSG OF 2015 ON A GIRL’S T SHIRT…

1. No use of looking… They won’t get bigger, unless u work on them!

2. Did y really look here only to read this text ..??

Uploaded By: Santhosh May,11 2015
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Funniest Thought

The funniest thought..

Always smile in the morning..
it makes people wonder that what YOU did last night..!
Ha ha ha ha..
Have a good day

Uploaded By: Nikki May,11 2015
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Sher Ko Kiss

Circus mein ladki ne sher ko kiss kiya to
Ring mastar ne kaha Aap mein se koi yeh kar sakta hai,
Santa- Zarur par pehle iss sher ko peeche hatao!

Uploaded By: Angel May,11 2015
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IDEA SIR JEE

An idea can change ur life but a woman can change ur IDEA…
So always change women to change ideas…
What an IDEA SIR JEE…

Uploaded By: Julia May,11 2015
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Diffrence

Eclairs aur i-pil me kya fark hai?

Socho..

Aur socho…

Choti bachhi eclairs khaa k masti karti hai
Aur
Badi bachhi masti karke i-pil khati hai

Uploaded By: Gujju May,11 2015
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Just Imagine

Just imagine:

U & ur lover r having a deeep kiss..

in a romantic atmosphere..

&

Suddnly

ur Lover VOMITS..
Just Imagine..

Uploaded By: Rajaan May,11 2015
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Drinking Boy

After drinking Boys:

talk unnecessarily

Become emotional

Drive badly

Stop thinking

Fight 4 nothing

Gals can do all these without drinking! 

Uploaded By: Farhan May,11 2015
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Who is NEHA

1 day all people of Earth went to GOD n asked who is d Most Loving, Honest n Smart Person?
They all return to Earth with a new Ques-

Who is NEHA!

Uploaded By: Sneha May,11 2015
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Khofnaak Item

Ek bacha mummy se pitne k baad,
Papa kabhi aap jungle gaye ho ?

Papa- Nahi beta

Bacha- Phir aap itna khofnaak item kahan se pakad laye.

Uploaded By: Santhosh May,11 2015
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Golden & True words

Golden & True words:
Insan ki kamyaabi uski pehli girlfrnd ki wajah se hoti hai
or
uski baki girlfrnds uski kamyabi ki wajah se hoti hai
It’s 100% true!

Uploaded By: Santi May,11 2015
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Maine Paya

God ne achcha dil banaya jo mene paya
Fir God ne achcha dimag bnya jo maine paya
Fir God ne 1achcha dost bnya
O hello
Is bar mene nhi Aapne paya

Uploaded By: Liza May,11 2015
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Not On Whatsapp

She :- Tu Whatsapp Pe Hai Kya? . . . . . . Me :- Nahi Sorry Main Whatsapp Pe Nahi Hu, Whatsapp Mere Phone Me Hai..


Uploaded By: Roopa May,11 2015
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Lovely Friends

Nasha Mohabbat” ka ho
“Sharab” ka ho ….ya
“Whats App” ka ho.
“Hosh” teeno mein kho jate hai
“Farak” sirf itna hai ki,
“Sharab” saala deti hai…
“Mohabbat” rula deti hai,
Aur
“Whats App” yaaro ki yaad dila deti hai…!
Dedicated to all my lovely friends.

Uploaded By: Mariya May,11 2015
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Ticket Mat Lena

BF text to his GF on watsApp..
.
BF – Hi
.
GF – Hello
.
BF – Kahan pr ho?
.
GF – Main apne papa ki BMW me club ja rhi hu,
abhi driver mujhe club chor dega,
uske baad mall mey shopping k liye jaungi,
tab tumhe call krti hu,
Tum kahan par ho?
.
BF – 401 no ki bus me,
TUMHARI SEAT K PICHE,
TUM TICKET MAT LENA MaiNE LE LI HAI.

Uploaded By: Viraj May,11 2015
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Newspaper Band

Aaj Subha Maine Newspaper Mein
Padha Ki: “Doston Ke Saath WhatsApp
Karne Se Sabse zyada Time Waste Hota
Hai.”
To Aaj Se…..
.
Newspaper Band.
Sala Doston Pe Ungli Uthata Hai….:P

Uploaded By: Rajaan May,11 2015
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Kamre Ka Jugaad

Normal aashiq : Piya basanti re kaahe sataye
aaja.
delhi aashiq : Piya Basanti re kamre ka
jugaad hogaya
aaja.

Uploaded By: Mahesh Babu May,11 2015
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