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Nikki's Joke
Rules Of Game

You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.

May,29 2015
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Chocolate Colored Lipstick

Style diva Rekha wears only crimson or chocolate colored lipstick when making public appearances.

May,29 2015
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Tumhe Hi Pagal Samjhenge

Tum haste raho, nachte raho, muskurate raho,
sada khil khilate raho, khush raho aur gungunate raho,
mera kya hai, log tumhe hi pagal samjhenge…

May,28 2015
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Mardangi

Ladkiyon Ke Samne Hamesha Apna Cina Taan Kar Chale, Aisa Karne Se Mardangi Jhalkti Hai Aur Ladkiyan Mardon Ko Hi Pasand Karti Hai.

May,27 2015
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Research the company's profile and background

Research the company's profile and background. Start by looking into their future goals and plans. Conducting the interview with this in mind will make you seem like a good long-term investment. You should also be ready to talk in depth about the industry, the organization, and the position you are applying for.

May,27 2015
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Check Your Firewall

Checking your firewall sounds complicated, but it really isn’t. If you own a Windows-based system, just go to your control panel and type “firewall” in the search box. If your firewall is “on” or “connected,” then you’re good to go. If you own a Mac, click the Apple icon on your toolbar, go to “system preferences,” then “security,” then “firewall.” Making sure you have a firewall in place can go a long way toward keeping criminals out. Make sure that you share some of your folders only on the home network. If you don’t really need your files to be visible to other machines, disable file and media  sharing completely.

May,27 2015
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Parchaye Banate Hai
um dosto ko jaan samjhate hai….
hum dosto ko humrah samjhate hai…
dost hame bewafa samjhe to kya huwa…
hum dosto ki parchaye banate hai…
May,27 2015
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Aap Bhi Roye Honge

Yaadon me humari aap bhi khoye honge,
Khuli aankho se kbhi aap bhi soye honge,
Mana hasna hain adaa gam chhupane ki
Par haste haste kabhi aap bhi roye honge.. 

May,26 2015
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Is Your Dog Bits

Man1 Sitting with dog.
Man2:Your dog bits?
Man1:No
Man2:sits and the dog bits!
Man2:angrily, you said he does not bit!
Man1:That is not my dog.

May,23 2015
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Signal Mile Ya Na Mile

Marne pe hum dono ko jannat mile,
Yeh hava yeh bahar mile,
SMS karne mein kanjusi mat kar mere dost,
Pata nahi jannat mein signal mile ya na mile.

May,21 2015
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Rashan Card par naam

Jaan-pehchaan hote hi
ladko ko ladki ko whatsapp par add karne
ki itni jaldi hoti hai.. mano..
hone wali BIWI ka Rashan Card par naam chadhwana ho!!

May,18 2015
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Never Mind

Galileo:Great mind…Einstein:genius mind…Newton:Extraordinary mind….Bill gates:brilliant mind…..ME:Never Mind

May,13 2015
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Scotch Brite Se

Santa : what are u doing, bro?
Banta : dinner, followed by scotch
Santa : bhai, black label?
Banta : nahi bhai, scotch brite se bartan dho raha hun

May,13 2015
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Bas Tumara

Din ho ya raat ho
Bass tumhara saath ho
Khushi main, gham main
Jannat main ya Dozahk main
Din ho ya raat ho
Bas tumara saath ho

May,13 2015
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Smile Jarur Kare

Ladkiyon Se Jab Bhi Mile Ek Pyari Si Smile Jarur Kare.

May,11 2015
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Beautiful Gift Jarur De

Unka Birth Day Kabhi Naa Bhule Aur Unhe Koi Beautiful Gift Jarur De, Yaa Ek Rose.

May,11 2015
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Funniest Thought

The funniest thought..

Always smile in the morning..
it makes people wonder that what YOU did last night..!
Ha ha ha ha..
Have a good day

May,11 2015
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I hit the spot

I’ve been thinking about u and me..
if we were alone how it would be..
I would kiss u all over till ur feeling hot..
then give u a sensation when I hit the spot!

May,5 2015
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Kisses wasted

Kisses blown are kisses wasted.
kisses are not kisses unless they are tasted.
kisses spread germs and germs are hated.
but you can kiss me baby i am vaccinated

May,5 2015
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Dete Hi Rahenge
Baagon mein phool khilte rahenge, raat mein deepak jalte rahenge, khudaa aapko saari khushiyaan de, baaki takleef to hum dete hi rahenge.
May,5 2015
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Gopal button wala
Height of tv ads! Villein ladki ki ijjat loot ra tha.. Leki wo ladki ka blouse ki button ni khol paya.. Peche se aawaj aai Aapki bahu betion ki rakha kare gopal button wala..
May,5 2015
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Judwa Bachche
2 Judwa Bachche.. 1st Hans ke Lot Pot ho raha tha.. 2nd Udaas tha. Dad: Tum itna kyun Hans rahe ho. Son: Mummy ne itni thand mein dono bar isi ko Nehla Diya.. haha
May,5 2015
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BAS CHUP
New Theory: Arguments wins the person but loses the relation..!! So Don’t argue with ur friends just, Slap them & say: BAS CHUP.. TU galat hai or mai sahi..!!! Ab jo bola wo kutta.
May,5 2015
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Shadi Ki Album
santa ne daru pike apne apko aaine me dekha or bola isko to khi dekha h o yad aaya ye to wahi kmina h jo shadi k album me meri bb k sath tha
May,5 2015
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mohabbat ke shole

Palak : Arj kiya hai 

Tum se nazar milate hi bhadak uthe mere dil mein 

mohabbat ke shole,

Ole Ole Ole, Ole Ole Ole !

May,4 2015
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Sochne ke paise

Kapil : Soch raha hu USA ghoom aun, free mein,

Sharukh : Free mein kaise jayega ?

Kapil : Sochne ke paise thodi lagte hai !!

May,4 2015
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Sharmate Bahut Ho

Ek aap ho ki sharmate bahut ho,
Ek aap ho ki itrate bhi bahut ho,
Dil to karta hai ki aapko dinner pe ley javein,
Lekin kya kare kambakht ki app khaate bhi bahut ho.

May,4 2015
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My Style

It’s not my attitude it’s my style..

May,4 2015
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Nashili aankho

Nashili aankho se wo jab hamein dekhte hain,
hum ghabraakar ankhen jhuka leite hain,
kaun milaye unn ankhon se ankhen,
suna hai wo ankho se apna bana leite hai.

May,4 2015
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Ever change

As long as you're still the same person I fell for, my feelings won't ever change.

May,1 2015
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Burger please

At PVR..
Customer- One veg burger please..
Shopkeeper- Sir, do you want me to vomit?
Customer- What !!
Shopkeeper- Shall I vomit sir..?
(30 seconds of looooong pause..)
Customer- Oh ya ya please.. please warm it..
Height of polished English accent.

May,1 2015
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Hain kaun

humne bhukhe rahekar aapko milaya phone,
aapne khaate hue puchha hum aapke hain kaun

Apr,30 2015
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Dozahk main

Din ho ya raat ho
Bass tumhara saath ho
Khushi main, gham main
Jannat main ya Dozahk main
Din ho ya raat ho
Bass tumara saath ho

Apr,30 2015
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Lo aagyi bolo

Husband apne ghar ki lights theek kar raha tha..
Tabhi usne awaz di Pappu ki maa sunti ho…
Wife: Kya hai ji..
Husband: Zara idhar toh aao
Wife: Lo aagyi bolo kya hua?
Husband: Ye doo taar hai isme se ek pakad..
Wife: Lo pakad liya.
Husband: Kuch hua?
Wife: Nahi toh..
Husband: Iska matlab current dusre taar mein hai!!

Apr,30 2015
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Dear Monday

Dear Monday, can you please die or go to hell

Apr,30 2015
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About people

Something i learned about people… if they do it once, they’ll do it again

Apr,30 2015
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Women’s Mood

Only 2 things Can Change a women’s Mood..

1) I Love You.

2) 50% Disount!

Apr,30 2015
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Pretty girl

What do gay couple say on seeing a beautiful, pretty girl?
Yaar ye aisi hai to iska bhai kaisa hoga!!

Apr,30 2015
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गलत इम्प्रेशन

मजनू्ओं की तरह हरकतें न करें गलत इम्प्रेशन पड़ेगा।

Apr,29 2015
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उपलब्धि का

पिताजी या अन्य परिजनों आदि की उपलब्धि का बखान आगे बढ़कर करें।

Apr,29 2015
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Shadi karva

Girl: Dua karo main Fail ho jaon..

Friend: Kyun?
Girl: Abbu ne kaha hai ke..
1st aayi To LAPTOP..
2nd aayi To MOBILE Aur
Fail Ho gayi to Shadi karva doon ga!!

Apr,29 2015
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As pillow

3 College Rules:
1) Be quiet in class bcoz other are sleeping.
2) Dont forget to carry ur book bcoz it work as pillow.
3) Keep the college clean…. So always be Absent.

Apr,29 2015
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Bathroom

Blind boy giving sweet to all.
Aunty came from bathroom
without dress to get sweets,
knowing he’s blind.
Aunty: what’s special?
Boy: I got my eyes!

Apr,29 2015
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Stock Market

How to make 1 million Rupees in the Stock Market?

Ans: SIMPLE… Start with 2 Millions!

Apr,29 2015
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Aankho Ne

Tumhari lovely aankho ne,
Hame aise attract kiya,
Ke sabko neglect karke,
Tumhe hi select kiya

Apr,28 2015
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Smile Again

It doesn’t matter who hurt you,

or broke you down,

what matters is who made you smile again

Apr,28 2015
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Like N Love

Beautifully answered by Lord Buddha :

Master, What’s the difference between ‘like’ n ‘love’?

Buddha’s answer was so simple:
When u like a flower, u just pluck it. But when u love a flower, u water it daily..!

One who understand this, understands LIFE

Apr,28 2015
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Perfect Relationship

I don’t want the perfect relationship,
because perfect is impossible.
I want trustworthy, honest, loyal and love.
I love imperfections.
I don’t want perfect.
I want worth it

Apr,28 2015
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Many Gardens

I Searched many gardens to select a flower to give u as gift,
But, I didn’t find any flower beautiful than ur Smile.
HAVE A NICE DAY

Apr,28 2015
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someone

When i look at you,
i cannot deny there is God,
cause only God could have created some one
as wonderful n beautiful as you

Apr,28 2015
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