STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
1 gaon me Rahul Gandhi ko 1 bache ne kaha:
Sirji 14 mahino se yaha school me teacher nahi he.
Rahul- To school kaise chal raha he?
Bacha- Jaise desh chal raha hai!
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BANTY- Tuje aisa kab laga ki,
Ab tuje bhagwan bhi nahi bacha sakta
BABLU- Jab loose motions ho aor PAIJME ka NADA na khule.
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Mahek Teri Aaj Bhi Meri Saanso Me Hai,
Har Ek Adaa Teri Meri Aankhon Me Hai,
Bhale Mitade Dil Se Mera Wajood,
Magar Teri Jagah Aaj Bhi Meri Har Yaadon Me Hai..
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Tu Na Samjhe to Samjhau Kaise,
Apni Chahat Ka Ehsas Dilau Kaise,
Tu to Apni Duniya Me Khush He,
Lekin
Mera Kya Haal Hai Tere Bina Batau Kaise
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A lonely tear is set out free
I’m sitting alone for all to see;
you r far away, how can it be?
My heart cries out,” Come back to me!!”
I MISS U A LOT…
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Aik FAQEER nay ghar k bahir se Awaz lagayi,
Babu ji roti milegi
Andar se awaz ayi
Biwi ghar per nahi hai
FAQEER:
Main ny Roti laini hai CHUMMI"nahi.
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I don’t care how many lips u’ve kissed,
how many shoulders u’ve embraced
& how many times u’ve said, I Luv U!
All I care is not be the first but to be ur last!
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A tiny flicker of hope..!! Though a way much tiny, i’m still happy…!!!
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Some Guys hold their Girlfriend’s hand in Malls
Bcoz
If they leave her hand.. She’ll go shopping,
It looks ROMANTIC but actually its ECONOMIC.
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Tailor Larki Ka Naap Letay Hoye:
Koi Boyfriend Ha?
Girl: Han Ha Kio?
Tailor: Usay kehna K Thora Right Walay Pr Bhi Dehan Do,
Fitting Sahi Nhi Aa Rahi.
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5 ladke 1 ladki ko jabardasti kiss kar rahe the ladki chilla rahi thi,
kutto
kamino
beshrmo
haramjado
lado mat sabki bari aayegi!
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hamaa bani to parwaane bane
Jaam bana to maikhaane bane
Kuchh to khaas baat hai bittu sharma teri family mein…
Warna, yun hi nahin shehar mein Pagalkhaane bane
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What kisses mean!
KISS ON HAND=I adore u,
KISS ON CHEEK=Lets be friends,
KISS ON NECK=I Want u,
KISS ON LIPS=I Love u,
KISS ANYWHERE ELSE,
Lets not get carried away!
1
Mobile Marriage Bureau:
Rishtey k liye 1 dabaye,
Mangni k liye 2 dabye,
Shadi k liye 3 dabye,
Dusri shadi k liye Pehle wale ka gala dabye..!
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Ladki ek aisi paheli hai,
kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai.
Kharcha karo to bole “darling, how are you?”.
Na karo to bole “brother, who are you?”.
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1 Apple… No Doctor
1 Tulsi Patta… No Cancer
1 Nimbu… No Fat
1 Glass Milk… No Bone Problms
3 Ltr Water… Skin Saaf
&
Daily Whatsapp… No stress, Mood fresh :D
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Something i learned about people… if they do it once, they’ll do it again…
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एक युवक गाँव में स्थित अपने ससुराल गया। उसने अपने साले को उपहार स्वरूप इत्र की शीशी दी। साले ने इत्र को अपनी हथेली पर उडेला और चाट डाला। उस युवक को बहुत बुरा लगा। उसने यह बात शिकायत के तौर पर अपने ससुर जी से कही।
ससुर जी ने कहा, ''बड़ा बेवकूफ है। यूँ ही क्यों चाट गया? घर में रोटी थी। उसमें चुपड़ कर खाता।
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एक लड़की पढ़ाई कर ले तो परिवार के 4 लोगो को शिक्षित करसकती है.
पर एक लड़की कॉलेज जाती है तो 40 लड़के फेल हो जाते है.
उसका क्या???
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Alia Bhatt: Let's go for movie .
Varun: Shit, I've got a doctor's appointment today..
Alia Bhatt: Just cancel it,Tell him you're sick.
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Other Teams - Soch badi honi chiye
Mumbai Indians - Coach bade hone chiye
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डायरेक्टर: मैंने द्रौपदी के रोल के लिए Sunny Leone को साईंन कर लिया है....
दुशासन: वोह तोह ठीक है, पर मै खीचूँगा क्या...??
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Has deyon Doston nu hasaan vaaste,
Marr java Doston ko manaan vaaste,
Baisakhi hai khushi manaan vaaste,
Baisakhi ki vadhiyan saare parivar nu.
Happy Baisakhi
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Are you an alcoholic?
I found a Leaflet in my newspaper this morning which read,“ARE YOU AN ALCOHOLIC? CALL NOW. WE CAN HELP!”
My wife insisted I make the call..
I Called up.It Was A Liquor Shop Offer : “Buy 3 & Get 1 Free”…
My eyes were filled with tears of joy.!!
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Banta’s plan after dinner
Santa : what are u doing, bro?Banta : dinner, followed by scotch
Santa : bhai, black label?Banta : nahi bhai, scotch brite se bartan dho raha hun
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BoY : Ro kyu rahi ho..??
GaL : Mere Marks bahut kam aaye hai…
BoY : Bata kitne aaye hai..??
GaL : Sirf 88% ..
Boy:
“Khuda ka Khauf kar ..
Itne mein to 2 Ladke Pass ho jate hai…!!”
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25 year Old Boy :
I Love u Mom.
Mom :- Hmm…Kaun hai wo ? Kahan rehti hai ?
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Boy-What is your age?
Girl-we girls dont revail our age to boys..!
Boy-ok whats your Email?
Girl-Pooja1988@gmail.com..!
Boys samjhai to thoko like..! Warna pogo dekho..!
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Use jis khel men ruchi hai tum bhi wahi khel khelo. Aue khelte samay ki tasveeren apne facebook mein post kardo. Jab tumhe hazaaron ladkon ke comments aayenge to wo khud hi tumhare baare mein soch soch kar tumhe apna dil de baithega.
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Pyar usse iss qadar karta chala jaaun,
Wo zakhm de aur main bharta chala jau
Usski zid hai ki wo mujhe maar hi dale,
To meri b zid hai ki uspe marta chala jaau
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When U Breathe, U Respire.
Wah wah
When U Breathe, U Respire !
Wah wah kya baat hai
When u Don’t Breathe, U Expire.
Subhanallah.. Maar hi daala..!!
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संता- अगर सरकार ताजमहल के अन्दर पान और गुटखा खाने कि अनुमति दे दे..तो.
बंता-कसम से ये गुटखा खाने वाले ताजमहल को लालकिला बना देंगे..
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संता- जल्दी से यहां एक एम्बुलेंस भेज दीजिए, मेरे दोस्त को एक गाडी ने टक्कर मार दी है। उसके नाक से और कान से खून बह रहा है। शायद उसकी टांग भी टूट गयी है।
ऑपरेटर- आप किस जगह पर हैं कृपया वो बता दीजिए।
संता- कनॉट प्लेस में।
ऑपरेटर- आप मुझे स्पेलिंग बता दीजिए?
आगे से कोई आवाज़ नहीं आई।
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संता- तेरे होंठ कैसे जल गए?
बंता- अरे कुछ नहीं यार, बीवी को रेलवे स्टेशन छोडऩे गया था। वह मायके जा रही थी और खुशी के मारे ऐसा पागल हो गया कि ट्रेन के इंजन को ही चूम लिया।
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अपने आप को उसके अनुसार ढालने की कोशिश करें। वह क्या पसंद करती है और क्या नहीं यह जानने की कोशिश करें। जब डिनर पर जाएँ तो आप उसकी पसंद का खाना ही खाएँ।
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Kyon tujhi ko dekhna chahati hain meri aankhein,
Kyon khamoshiyaan karti bas hain teri baatein,
Kyon itna chahane laga hoon tujhko main,
Ki taare ginte huye kat-ti hain meri raatein,
Tu hi kuchh bata de kya main karoon inka,
Har pal jo mujhe tadpaati hain teri yaadein.
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रंग बरसे भीगे चुनर वाली,
रंग बरसे, ओ रंग बरसे
भीगे चुनर वाली..
रंग बरसे, अरे रंग बरसे
भीगे चुनर वाली..रे!
अब घर जाओ नहीं तो
जुकाम लग जायेगा
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As per naturopathy, certain colours can energize and calm one down. They make one happy or sad & heal or irritate. May God shower you with all the happy happy colours of life! Have a joyous and colourful Holi!
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Holi is the time to unwind, de-stress and bond with sweets, Thandai and colours. Come let's rejuvenate by immersing ourselves in the colour of joy, happiness and laughter!
Happy Holi!
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Play with colours, not with with hooligans;
Drink Thandai but don't get drunk;
Eat Gujiya but don't gormandize;
Make friends with colours and not enemies. Happy Holi!
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Rango Ke Is Tyohar Me Sabhi
Rango Ke Ho Bharmaar, Dher
Saare Khushiyon Se Bhara Ho
Aap Ka Sansaar, Yehi Dua Hai
Bhagwan Se Humare Har Baar,
Holi Mubarak Ho Mere Yaar..!
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Saade rang ko galti se aap naa kora samjho,
Isi mey samaaye indradhanushi saaton rang,
Jo dikhe aapko zindagi saadagi bhari kisi ki,
To aap yun samjho satrangi hai duniya usiki,
Holi aayi satrangi rango ki bouchar laayi,
Dher saari mithai aur mitha mitha pyar laayi,
Aap ki zindagi ho mithe pyar aur khusiyon se bhari,
Jisme samaaye saaton rang yahi shubhkamna hai hamaari.
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Rango ke tyohar mein sabhi rango ki ho bharmar,
Dher saari khushiyon se bhara ho aapka sansar,
Yahi dua hai bhagwan se hamari har bar,
Holi Mubarak ho mere yaar!
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Horror films me Ladki ko ghar me jb kch ajeeb sunai deta he to wo kehti h- Kon he wahan?
Jaise k Bhoot bolega: Han jaan me kitchen me hu..
Pakode khaogi kya?
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Ankhon se barsaat hoti hain Jab apki yaad saath hoti hai, Jab b busy rahe mera cell to Samajh lena aapki hone wali Bhabhi se meri baat hoti hain.
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What i need to live
has been given to me
by the earth..
Why i need to live
has been given to me
by you my valentine !!!
Happy Valentines Day
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Feelings are always the same
Saying it could be in different ways,
Some say it directly are called 'LOVERS'
Some write them on paper & are called 'POETS' =)
Happy Valentines Day
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Just push by her once and make it look like a mistake. Then apologize and introduce yourself.
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This can shift your attention. Plus, exploring different sexual positions can make sex more exciting and ensure that both partners are satisfied.
Also, don't be afraid to stop having sex temporarily to focus on her.
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Ladkiyan Agar Group Me Ho To Aap Unhe (Jinhe Patana Hai) Hi Dekhte Rahe, Aisa Karne Se Wo Bhi Aap Ke Taraf Attract Ho Jayegi.
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