Wo Muskura Rahe Hai Hume Tanha Chod Kar,
Kiye Huye Saare Waado Ko Tod Kar.
Unke Siva Kahi Dil Lagta Bhi Nahi,
Ab Kya Karenge Hum Apne Toote Huye Dil Ko Jod Kar.
Ek Raat,
Ek Chor,
Ek Sardar k Ghar me Ghus gaya aur bola: SONA kaha hai?
Sardar: Ullu k patthe,
Pura Ghar khaali hai kahi bhi jaake SOJA.
World Cup 2015 Groups,
Group A: India,Pak,Srilanka, Aus, NZ, West Indies, SA, Eng, Ban, Zimbabwe, Canada Ireland.
Group B: Rajnikanth.
Munna: Kya kar rela hai circuit?
Circuit: Bhai bulb pe baap ka naam likh rela hu
Munna: Kyun!
Circuit: Bhai, baap ka naam roshan karne ka he na.
Kisi shayar ne kaha,
Zindagi ek lamba safar haim
Kisi aashiq ne kaha,
Zindagi ek mushkil paheli haim
Are dosto zindagi ka arth toh sirf voh bata sakta hai,
Jiski shaadi ke baad bhi koi saheli hai.
Sardar: Jaldi se chaddi nikalo, Aaj Sex ka Mood hai.
Ladki: Maine chaddi nhi pehni.
Sardar: Thik hai, kal chaddi pehan k aana, Kal kar lenge.
Be playful, funny and have a sense of humor. Do not be embarrassed and shy of her. Be confident and join into conversations with her.
Kisi roj yaad na kar pau to khudgarj na samjh lena,
Darasl choti si iss umar mai presaniya bhut hai,
Main bhoola nhi hu kisi ko mere bahot achhe dost hai zmane me,
Bs thodi zindagi uljhi pdi hai do waqt ki roti kmane me.
Pati aur patni ghumne gaye.
Raaste me ek gadhe ko ghaas kata dekh,
Patni ne pati se kaha: Oo G tumhara rishtedaar ghaas,
kha raha hai, namaste karo.
Pati: Namaste Sasur Ji.
Neymar: मैं फुटबॉल को अपनी उंगलियों पर 2 घंटे तक घुमा सकता हूँ।
RAJNIKANT: तुम्हे क्या लगता है.. ये पृथ्वी किसकी उंगलियों पर घूम रही है।
Boy: Hey do you like water?
Girl: Yeah.
Boy: Good, then you already like 70% of me.
Aamir Khans Lagaan had the maximum number of British actors ever to be cast in a single movie in the history of Bollywood cinema.
Ek Aadmi Ki Bike Puncture Ho Gayi Kisi Tarha Vo Usko Lekar Pass Ke Ek Service Station Mein Pahuncha.
Vaha Jake Pucture Lagane Wale Ladke Se Bola.
Aadmi: Bike Gaseet Gaseet Ke Gaand Fatt Gayi.
Ladke Ne Confuse Hoke Puchha: To Phir Pahle Puncture Kaha Lagau, Gaand Pe Ya Bike Mein.
Ek Bar Karo Na Plz Kisi,
Ko Pata Nahi Chalega Plz,
Karo Naaa Muje Acha Lage Ga,
Ek Bar Hamari Dosti Ki Khatr,
Kar Do Na Plz Ek Pyara Sa Sms.
Just say Hi and take it from there. Do not be too questionable about her life, but talk about everyday things with her.
Santa: Ek Kunwari Ladki Niche Khadi Hai Ko English me Kis Tarah kahoge?
Banta: Boss, Malum Nahi.
Santa: Are Bewakoof Itna bhi Nahi Jantey Miss Under Standing (Misunderstanding).
Teacher To Student: What Is Hyper Active Possessive Definition Of Circulated Motion.
Student: Zimbalakadi Takada Bamba Huchalu.
Teacher: I Did Not Understand What You Said.
Student: Same Here, Mam.
Santa Ne Socha Ki Sunday Free Hun Aaj Movie Hi Dekh Aau.
Par Jaisi Hi Theatre Mein Gaya Vaha Laga Film Ka Board Dekh Ke Vapis Aa Gaya.
Kyunki,
Us Film Ka Naam Thha Housefull.
Teacher: Kal School kyon nahi aaye tum?
Pappu: GirlFriend Se Milne Gaya Tha.
Teacher: Kis Liye?
Pappu: Yes Sir.
Teacher: Maine Pucha Kis Liye?
Pappu: Liye Sir, Bahut liye.
Ek ooncha oont hai, poochh oonchi oont ki, poochh se bhi oonchi kya, peeth oonchi oont ki.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
Where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
Dard hi dena tha to mukka mar dete Dost,
Sofe par sui rakhne ki kiya zaroorat thi?
Ooeee.
Ma.
Diffrent b/w Govt. Hospital and Pvt. Hospital:
Govt. Hospital: Doctor Nurse par aur Patient Farsh par.
Pvt. Hospital: Patient Nurse par, Doctor Patient ke purse par.
Hamesha ladke ko ladki se akh milakar baat karni chahia. Isse unhe apki confidence ka pata chalta hai orh ek baar orh jo baat akho se ho sakti hai wo baat kisi se nhi ho sakti. Akhe bin kahe kafi kuch bol sakti hai jo jawan bhi nhi bol sakti.
Kapil and a Girl on a Bus Stop,
Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha Nice Lipstick.
Girl: Thanks.
Kapil: Oo Ji Main kha Nice Top and Jeans.
Girl: Thanks.
Kapil: Aur to aur Nice Necklace.
Girl: Thank you So Much BHAIYA.
Kapil: Kamaal Hai, Itni saari acchhi cheezein, Phir bhi tu Bhootni Lag rahi hai.
Lamhe honge mulakat bhi hogi,
Hum sath hai to phir baat bhi hogi,
Jab kabhi jarurat ho hamari to mudkar dekhna,
Hamari dosti hamesha aapke sath hogi.
Dil se roye magar honthon se muskara baithe,
Yuhi hum kisi se wafa nibha baithe,
Wo hume zindagi ka ek lamha bhi na de sake,
Aur hum un par apni saari zindagi luta baithe.
kapil: Puri Zindagi Padhai Karte Hain.
Bt Hum Se Zyada To Anpad Minister Hi Kamate Hain.
To Hum Sab Ko Kya Mila.
BABAJI KA THULLU.
Master: Beta koi ashiqi wala sher sunao.
Studt: Mota marta moti pe,
Bhukha marta roti pe,
Master ji ki hai do beti,
Aur mai marta hu chhoti pe.
Life’s Tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late
Wise men don’t need advice. Fools won’t take it.
Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one
You may delay, but time will not.
Uska Khayal Ab Na Mere Dil Me Ayega,
Wo B To Kuch Dino Me Mujhy Bhool Jayega,
Royega Wo Kar K Yaad Meri Wafaon Ko,
Wo Dil Jab Kisi Or Se Dil Lagaega.
Universal Truth: Sun rises in the East.
Fact: Sun neither rises nor sets, only earth rotates.
Moral: Education kills our common sense.
Santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi.
Banta: Saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga.
Santa: Dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar.
Before going to bed.
She: Tell me those three magical words.
Adminsanjay: So jaa chudail.
Blocked.
College is 4 Knowledge,
Knowledge is 4 Life,
Life is 4 Wife,but
Wife is a knife which cuts ur Life,
So never choose ur Wife in a College Life.
Mom: Beta zara Papa ko Bulana.
Me To Dad: Chalo Bulava Aya,
Hai Mata ne Bulaya Hai.
Dad: Beta Zor se bolo.
Me: Jai Mata Di.
Flying Chappal.
Khoyi si aankho me sapna aapka saja Liya,
Aarzu me aapki chahat ko basa Liya,
Dhadkan bhi na rahi jaruri hamare Liye,
Jab se DIL me aapko basa Liya.
Pressing the 0 (zero) key on your keyboard will jump to the beginning of a video.
The home key also works for jumping to the start of a video.
Sometimes the best hair treatments aren’t in the beauty aisle, but in the pantry.
Here are some of the best DIY recipes for hair masks that you can mix up in your kitchen.
Hum nazaro se dur hai ankho se nahi,
hum khwabo se dur hai khayalo se nahi,
hum dil se dur hai dhadkan se nahi,
hum apse dur hai apki yado se nahi.
MISS YOU
Use karte hain make-up ka dabba roz kyu,
Ban sanwar kar nikalte hain roz kyu,
Mummy, tum to kehthi thi Eid to kab ki gayi,
Phir padosan se gale milte hain papa roz kyu.
Use karte hain make-up ka dabba roz kyu,
Ban sanwar kar nikalte hain roz kyu,
Mummy, tum to kehthi thi Eid to kab ki gayi,
Phir padosan se gale milte hain papa roz kyu.