वक़्त नूर को बेनूर बना देता है!
छोटे से जख्म को नासूर बना देता है!
कौन चाहता है अपनों से दूर रहना
पर वक़्त सबको मजबूर बना देता है!
डिटर्जेंट के विज्ञापन में कितनी आसानी से बच्चे कपडे गंदे कर घर आ जाते हैं।
बचपन में हम आ जाया करते थे तो कपडे बाद में धुलते थे, पहले हम धुले जाते थे।
Santa And Banta Were Fixing A Bomb In A Car.
Santa : What Would You Do If The Bomb Explodes While Fixing.
Banta : Dont worry, I Have One More.
Kuchh Meethe pal Yaad Aate Hain,
Palkon Par Aasnu Chhod Jaate Hain,
Kal Koyi Aur Mil Jaaye To Hamein Na Bhool Jaana,
Dosti Ke Rishte Zindagi Bhar Kaam Aate Hain.
टीचर: पहले सन आया या मून
संता: मून मैडम.
टीचर: वह कैसे?
संता: मैडम, पहले हनी ‘मून’ होगा, तभी तो सन आएगा न
Punam Ki Rat Me Chand Badal Kata Hai,
Waqt Ke Sath Insan Badal Jata Hai,
Sochte Hai Ki Apko Tang Na Kare,
Magar Sochte Sochte Plan Badal Jata Hai.
School Mein Ladko Aur Ladkiyo Ki Race Hui.
Ek Ladki Ladko Se Jeet Gai.
Teacher: Tum Jeet Kaise Gai,
Girl: Piche Se Frock Utha Ke Bhagi Thi,
Koi Aage Hi Nahi Aaya.
Sunny Leone : PK Me Meri Acting Kaisi Lagi,
Aamir Khan : PK.. Kya Tu Kidhar Thi
Sunny Leone : Woh Dancing Car Me
Yaad Hai Jahaan Tumne Kapde Uthaaye The
True Story
Papers Ache Ho Ya Bure
Papers Khatam Hone Ki Khushi Bahot Hoti Hai
Sir : Samundar Mein Nimbu Ka Ped Ho To Tum Kaise Todoge
Santa : Chidiya Bankar
Sir : Aadmi Ko Chidiya Tera Baap Banayega.
Santa : Samundar Mein Ped Aapka Baap Lagayega.
हम तेरे साथ चलेंगे, तू चले ना चले,
तेरा हर दर्द सहेंगे, तू कहे या ना कहे,
हम चाहते है की, तुम सदा खुश रहो,
हम चाहे रहे या ना रहे
A Boy Proposed To A Girl,
Girl: I Am Not Accepting Your Proposal
But I Salute Your Choice.
Ladke Pagal Ho Jaatey Hain Pyar Me,
Baki Kasar Puri Ho Jaati Hai Intezaar Me.
Magar Ye Dard Ladkiya Nahi Samjhti,
Wo Toh Panipuri Khati Firti Hain Bazaar Me
Ladki Apne Ek Male Friend Se Poochti Hai ,
Ladki: Jab Tum Su-Su Kar Lete Ho To Uske Baad Apne Lund Ko Kyu Hilate Ho.
Ladka: Arey Hum Hilakar Use Yaad Dilate Hai Ki,
Pappu Beta Uth Tere Jeevan Ka Maqsad Sirf Peshab Karna Hi Nahi Hai
Mohabbat Ki Gawahi Apne Hone Ki Khabar Le Jaa.
Jidhar Wo Shaks Rehta Hai Mujhe Aye Dil Udhar Le Jaa.
Jab Us Khuda Nein Tumhe Banaaya Hoga,
Uske Dil Me Bhee Sukoon Aayaa Hogaa,
Usne Socha Hoga Ki Tumhe Apnee Loo,
Magar Phir Use Meraa Khayaal Ayaa Hoga.
Banta: Tumhari Shaadi Judwa Behen Mein Kisi Ek Se Ho Gayi
To Tum Apni Biwi Ko Kaise Pehchanoge,
Santa: Sharmayi To Saali Aur Chillayi To Gharwali
Na Din mai Light.Na Raat mai Light.
Wa wa wa
Na Din mai Light. Na Raat mai Light.
phir bhi hm apko kehte hai.
Sweet Dreams
Teacher To Papu : Tumne Home work Q Nahi Kiya.
Deadly Answr Given By,
Papu: Sir Kyuki Hum To Hostel Me Rahte Hai.
Santa Ne Kachha Dho Ke
Padosan Ki Shalvar K Paas Sukhne Daal Diya,
Aur Awaz Di Bhabi Ji,
Jab Tum Salvar Utarogi To Mujhe Awaz De Dena
Mai Bhi Kachha Utar Lunga.
Master: 2 Mein Se 2 Gaye To Kitne Rahe?
Pappu: Samjh Mein Nahi Ayaa Masterji.
Master: Beta Tumare Pas 2 Roti hai,
Tumne 2 Roti Khali, Tumare Paas Kya Bacha.
Pappu: Sabji.
Sone Ki Zameen Hoti.
Chandi Ka Aasman Hota.
Ya Khuda Kitna Khush Naseeb Hota Wo Pal.
Jis Pal Unka Didar Hota Hai.
Bhol K Bhi Kisiko Na Rulana,
Zindgi May Sabko Hasana,
Dushman Ko Bhi Galay Lagana,
Phir Bhi Koi Ghum De To,
Police Station Lay Aana..
Santa Te Lips Jale Hu The Banta : Kaise Jale
Santa : Wife Ko Raliway Station Droop Karne Gaya Tha.
Banta : Toh ?
Santa : Kushi Ka Mare Train Ke Engine Ko Choom Liya
Aapki Nayi Subah Itni Sayani Ho Jaye,
Dukhon Ki Sari Batein Aapki Purani Ho Jaye,
De jaye Itni Khushiya Ye Din,
Ki Khushi Bhi Aapki Muskurahat Ki Diwaani Ho Jaye.
Pani Dekh Pyaas Lagti Hai,
Shadi Dekh Kar Hume Bhi Aas Dikhti Hai,
Hum logo Kaise Samjhaye..
Ki Jar Zakkas Ladki Ki MAA Hume Apni SAAS Lagti Hai.
Girl: I Love YOU Dear.
Boy: Differnt Style Me Propos Karo Na
Girl: Teri Laash ko Aag Lgane Ka,
Chance Mere Bete Ko Dega Ki nhi.
Baar baar zindagi ko aazmaya hai hamne,
Har pal har lamha sirf gham paya hai humne,
Dil ke tukde usi ne kiye hai hamare,
Dil ki gehraiyon mein jise basaya hai hamne.
Suraj paas ho na ho roshni aas paas rehti hai,
Dost paas ho na ho, dosti aas paas rehti hai,
Waise hi aap paas ho na ho aapki,
Yaadein hamesha paas rehti hain.
Hamne socha tha har mod par tumhara saath denge,
Hamne socha tha har mod par tumhara saath denge,
Par kya karein kambakhat sadak hi seedhi nikli.
Teacher: Agar apna character sudharna hai,
To sab auraton ko MAA kaha karo.
Student: Madam is se mera character to theek rahega,
Par mere baap ka bigad jayega.
Kalam thi hath mai likhna sikhaya aapne,
Takat thi hath mai hosla dilaya aapne,
Manzil thi samne rasta dikhaya aapne,
Hum to sirf dost the, Aashiq banaya aapne.
May the good times and treasures of the present,
Become the golden memories of tomorrow.
Wish you lots of love, joy and happiness.
MARRY CHRISTMAS
Plan to arrive on time or a few minutes early.
Late arrival for a job interview is never excusable.
Santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi.
Banta: Saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga.
Santa: Dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar.
Agar app ek hi class me study karte hai toh app uski help kar sakte hai study me. App uske liye notes bana sakte hai jisse wo apke orh karib aa jayegi orh jabbhi use study me problem hogi toh wo apko hi yaad karegi.
Halaat keh rahe hain,
Wo yaad nahi karenge ab.
Umeed keh rahi hai,
Bss thoda intejaar aur kar.
Laafzo me kya taarif karun aapki,
Aap lafzo me kaise sama paaoge,
Jab log hamare baare me puchenege,
Meri aankho me jaanemaan sirf tum nazar aaoge.