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Munni's Joke
kya bana rahe hai?

1 gm jeera
3 kali mirch
2 spoon namak
4 spoon oil
1 cup water
or thoda sa hara dhaniya.
pta hai hum kya bana rahe hai?
Apko Bewkuf

 

Apr,21 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Narak me GandhiJi


Narak me GandhiJi-Mallika
Dance kar rahe The
Santa (yamraj se)-
GandhiJi ki saza Itni Mazedar kyu?
Yamraj- Abe Gadhe,
saza Mallika ki Hai

 

Apr,21 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Admin Hu

Ladki Wale Ladke se: Beta kya karte ho?
Ladka: Jee Administrative Department mein Hu.
Ladki Wale (Khush Hokar): Kaun si Company mein Beta.
Ladka: Whatsapp par 3-4 Groups ka Admin Hu.

Apr,21 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
God is good

God is good He knows what he is doing. When you can’t trace his hand trust his heart.. 

Apr,20 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Safai

जज : आपको अपनी सफाई में क्या कहना है?
महिला : मैं क्या कह सकती हूँ, मेरे यहाँ सफाई नौकरानी करती है। इस विषय में तो वही कह सकती है।

Apr,20 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
No Ball
In Year 2035:
My Son is excluded from 2035 World Cup because of Dhoni ~ Yograj Singh 
 
That wasn't No Ball ~ Bangladesh Fans 
Apr,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
69 Means

After 35 years of marriage
69 means
ek dusre k pair dabana.

 

Apr,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Haaaye Re garmi

Bahot afsos ho raha hai un bechare ladke
ladkiyo pe.... Jo..
Kambal, razai me chhup kar call
aur msg kiya karte the.. ..
Ab karo..
Haaaye ree Garmi.

Apr,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
BC Milan

If ever Virat Kohli decides to buy an Italian Football Club, he would name it
.
.
BC Milan ??????????????????

 

 

 

Apr,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Timepass

Mehfil-e-Timepass
Teer se na maaro,
patthar se maar do
Bas ek tamanna hai
muskuraakar aankh maar do!

Apr,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
IIN
Son: Seekh gaya, seekh gaya....
Idea Internet Network (IIN) se main bhi banana sikh gaya....
 
Father: Kya? Drone banana..?
 
Son: Nahi, Chutiya banana..
Apr,15 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Insult

What Kapil Sharma Says . . 
Aur Koi Bhai Bandhu Jo, Koi Sawaal Puchna Chahta Ho" ? . . . . 
What He Actually Means.......... 
"Aur Koi Bhai Bandhu Jo Apni Bezzati Karwaana Chahta Ho"... ?

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Khushbu Teri

Khushbu teri yaari di sanu mehka jandi hai,
Teri har ik kitti hoyi gal sanu behka jandi hai,
Saah taan bahut der lagande ne aun – jaan vich,
Har saah ton pehle teri yaad aa jaandi hai.
Happy Baisakhi

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Night with kapil

Boy-rat ka kya plan h ?? .
.
Girl-nthing , just night with kapil !!
.
Boy-kya???? .
.
Girl-opps sry i mean comedy night with kapil ..

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Friend ki tarif

Ladki patane ka sabse best tarika hota hai ke aap ladki ke samne uski friend ka tarif karo ise ladki ke dil main jalan hogi aur woh aap ko propose kar degi kyu ki ladkiya hi laladkiyo se jalti hai aur is jalne main hum ladko ka fayda hota hai.

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Pregnancy

Bacha maa se –Mom ye pregnant kya hota hai
Mom ne gusse se dekha toh wo samja ki gusse ko pregnant kehte hai…!!
2nd day bachcha school se aate hueek ladki ke upar gir gaya…!!
Ladki ki maa Chilla kar boli :Ye kya badtameezi hai???
Bacha bola:Gira teri beti ke upar hoon Aur pregnant tu ho rahi hai..!!

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Be practical

An apple a day
An apple a day….is almost a thousand rupees a month….!
Visiting a doctor is cheaper…!!
Be practical…!!   

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Maa Sab Janti hai..


35 yr old man :
Mom I love you ..

Mom : Beta pehle hi bola tha uss kamini se shaadi mat karna…!!

Apr,10 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Mareez Aur Doctor

Mareez (Nurse se):
I love you! Tumne mera dil chura liya hai… <3

.

Nurse (Sharmate hue):
Chal jhuthe, humne to dil ko hath bhi nahin lagaya, humne to sirf Kidney churai hai!! :-D

Apr,9 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Hum Kitne Bewafa

Hum Kitne Bewafa Hain Ke
Ek Dum Unke
Dil Se Nikal Gaye.
.
.
Un Main Kitni Wafa Thi Ki
Aaj Tak Mere Dil
Se Nahi nikle...!!

Apr,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Man's Invention

Did You Know . . .?
That
"HEELS" Are Man's Invention
To Make It Harder For A
Woman To Run Away.

Apr,7 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Yeh afwaah kisne failaayi

Ab Yeh afwaah kisne failaayi…
.
.
.
Ki…
Patanjali ki Shop bar kal se Ayurvedic Cigarette milegi..!

Apr,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
अब मैं तुम्हारी बीवी के दो टुकड़े करूंगा

जादूगर (संता से)-अब मैं तुम्हारी बीवी के दो टुकड़े करूंगा..

संता- क्या कर रहे हो भाई? इधर एक नहीं संभलती, तुम दो बनाने पर तुले हो

Mar,16 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
आपने कार के दो पहिए क्यों खोल डाले

पार्किंग में संता अपनी कार के दो पहिए खोलकर डिक्की में डाल रहे थे कि कांस्टेबल बंता आ गए।

बंता ने पूछा, 'आपने कार के दो पहिए क्यों खोल डाले?'

संता बोले, 'यहां लिखा हुआ है कि पार्किग केवल टू-व्हीलर्स के लिए है, इसलिए!'

 

Mar,16 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
वैसा ही डिजाइन बना दे

संता: यह क्या लिखा है बे? बंता: साले, जो शब्द समझ में आ रहा है, वह लिख और जो नहीं समझ में आ रहा है उसका वैसा ही डिजाइन बना दे। 

Mar,16 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
संता काफी दिनों के बाद पार्क में घूमने गया

संता काफी दिनों के बाद पार्क में घूमने गया। लौटकर उसने अपनी पत्नी से कहा, जानती हो, आजकल लोग मुझे भगवान मानने लगे हैं! पत्नी- तुम्हें कैसे पता? संता- आज जब मैं पार्क में घूमने गया तो लोग मुझे देखकर बोले- हे भगवान, तुम फिर आ गए! 

Mar,16 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
नींद से जगाने के लिए

नींद से जगाने के लिए नये तरीके अपनाएं, कोशिश करें कि उनकों जगाने के लिए उनकी ही रिकॉर्ड आवाज को उन्हें सुनाएं।

Mar,14 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
उनसे मिले

जब भी आप उनसे मिले प्यार से उनके सिर को चूमें।

Mar,14 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
ऑटोग्राफ

आप किसी दिन उनसे ये कह कर की “आप मुझे आपना ऑटोग्राफ देंगे तो ये मेरी खुशनसीबी होगी”. आप उनका ऑटोग्राफ मांगकर उनको खुश कर सकते हैं.

Mar,14 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bekar Ki Zindagi

Bekar ki Zindgi hum jiya nahi karte,
Expire honewali Dosti hum kiya nahi karte..
Mere SMS aapko Lifetime tak milenge,
Kyuki reply ki chinta hum kiya nahi karte.

Mar,14 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Kapil opened a new tailor shop

Kapil opened a new tailor shop Girl to Kapil : " kurti ki baazu 'net' wali banana." . . . . . . Kapil to girl : "3G ya 2G?"

Mar,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Puri Zindagi Padhai Karte Hain.

Puri Zindagi Padhai Karte Hain.
Bt Hum Se Zyada To Anpad Minister Hi Kamate Hain.
To Hum Sab Ko Kya Mila.
BABAJI KA THULLU....!!!!

Mar,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
wild and break

Mom's logic: If you go wild and break your legs, do not run to me and cry.

Mar,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dil Ka Dard

Dil ka dard dil todne wala kya jaane,
Pyar ke rivazon ko ye zamaana kya jaane,
Kitni takleef hoti hai ladki patane mein,
Yeh ghar baitha ladki ka baap kya jaane.

Mar,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Celebrate

Cannabis as a drink, Saankhein in meal;
Gujiya in Sweets and Colours to chill;
Have a happy Holi, celebrate it with zeal!

Mar,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ek Saas Tutna Baaki Hai

USKE didar ki tamanna baki hai,
USKE haath thamne ki haqiqat baki hai,
Mar to roz hi raha hu USKI yaad mein,
Bas ek saas tutna baaki hai..

Mar,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Sath Sona

Dua hai aapki achi nokri ho,
1 achi chokri ho,Aapko miss kare,
Mujhe kiss kare,Apko puppi de,
Mujhe jhappi de,Apke sath roye ,
mere sath soye.

Feb,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ladki ki Coke

Ldki Coke Pi Rhi Thi
Coke Me Machar Gir Gaya
Machar Ke Baap Ne Ldki Ko Aisa Kya Bola Ki Ldki Behosh Ho Gai


Ans - Teri Coke Me Mera Baccha Hai..

Feb,25 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
12 Mahine

Teacher To KG Kid: How Many Months AreThere In A Year...?
Kid: 12
Teacher: Wow... How Do You Know...?
Kid: Baara Mahine Mein Bara Tareeke Se Tujh Ko Pyar Jatao'n Ga Re...
DHINKA CHIKA DHINKA CHIKA....

Feb,12 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Winged cupid painted blind

Love looks not with

the eyes
but
with the mind
and
therefore is
winged cupid painted
blind ... :)

Feb,6 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Galiya

Teri galiyo mein kadam nahi rakhe ge hum aaj ke bad

kyoki

kichad ho gaya hai barsat ke bad

Feb,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Be Yourself

Fakeness is one of the biggest turnoffs for a girl. The same goes for lines. Unless the line is very sweet and original, don't use it.

Feb,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Relaxed & Cozy

Arrange to get massages in your hotel room right after the wedding. This will help work out any stressful kinks in your bodies, ease tired-from-dancing feet, and get you both in a very relaxed and cozy state of mind.

Feb,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak

A big part of flirting involves reactions to the partner. When telling a funny story, it may elicit comments encouraging interest, including asking "really?", saying "wow" and simply opening your mouth in amused disbelief.

Feb,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Arcade games

You may feel really awkward walking into a store full of kids. But it’ll only take a few games and a few minutes of awkwardness to bring out that inner child and have a wonderful date.

Feb,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Aashiq Ki Asshiqee


Vo Aashiq Jo Raat Bhar Apne Pyar Ki Yaad Me So Nhi Pate,
Crf Vhi Bta Skte Hai K..
.
.
.
Raat Ko Light Kb-Kb Jati Hai.

Jan,20 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Rajni Ki Phook

Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum
Barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum wah wah
Are aage kya hua?
Hona kya tha
.
.
Rajnikant ne phoonk mari or sukh gaye hum !!

Jan,17 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Rajnikanth Ka Mobile

Rajinikanth: Hello I'm Rajinikanth.
Receiver: Han Han, Pata Hai!
Rajinikanth: Tujhe Kaise Pata Chala, Main Rajinikanth Bol Raha Hun?
Receiver: Bass Kya Bhai... Mobile Switch Off Tha Mera!

Jan,12 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Pyaara Sa Ladka

Ek din aapki life me ek aisa ladka aayenga Jo apko bohat zyada pyaar karenga,aapko pyaar se chhuyega aur aapko dher sari KISSES karenga or kahega,"I LOVE U MUMMY".

Jan,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
With Or Without

Without you,
there is no reason to live every moment,
there is no reason to wake up every morning,
there is no reason to breathe every breath.

...Without you,
my world is gone,
my life is meaningless,
my heart stops beating.

Without you,
all the colors are dull,
all the food is tasteless,
all the flowers are wilted.

Jan,6 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
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