Santa: Kya mai tere mobile se sms bhej du meri girlfriend ko?
Banta: Kyo apne mobile se bhejo.
Santa: Yaar handwriting pehchan legi badi chalak hai.
Mostly ladkio ko barish bahut pasand hoti hai. App unhe brish wale din kahe gumane le ja sakte hai. Is condition me app unhe barish me nahane ke liye offer bi kar sakte hai.
Ek Gadhe Ne Santa Ko Laat Mar Di, Aur Baag Gaya.
Santa Ko Bada Gussa Aya Vo Bhi Uske Piche Piche Baagne Laga.
Bhagte Bhagte Usko Raste Mein Ek Zebra Mila.
Santa Ne Usko Zor Se Ek Laat Mari Aur Bola.
Santa: Sale Night Dress Pahan Ke Mujhe Ullu Banata Hai, Bevkoof Samjha Tha Kya.
Kadar karlo unki jo tumhe bina,
Matlab ke chahte hai.
Kyuki,
Duniya me khyal rakhne wale kam or,
Takleef dene wale zyda hote hai.
Ehsaan nahin ehsaas hain aashiqui,
Zindagi k mod pe emtihan hai aashiqui,
Aashiqui me jaan dena badi baat nahi,
Umar bhr sath nibhane ka nam h aashiqui.
Student ko miss ne thapar maara.
Teacher: Aaj Tum Late Q Aaye?
School 7 baje Shuru Hota Hai Fir der Q Ki?
Student: Teacher, Aap Mera Itni besabri se Intzar Mat Kiya Karo,
Log Galat Samajte hai.
Pita Ji Ne Apne Bete Ko Gusse Se Dant Te Hue Kaha.
Baap: Nalayak Kabhi Tumne Apni Koi Book Khol Ke Bhi Dekhi Hai?
Beta: Haan Papa Roz Kholta Hoon Ek Book.
Baap Hairani Se: Konsi?
Beta: Facebook.
Santa sing ka 20 saal bad bacha hua.
Wo udas ho gaya.
Banta: Yaar udas kion ho?
Santa: 20 sal baad bacha huwa wo bhi itna sa.
Ye faisalaa tha khuda ka ya jaane sazish thi zamaane ki.
Hum door ho gaye unse utna hi.
Jitni khwahish thi humein unke kareeb aane ki.
Wada Humne kiya Tha Nibhane k Liye,
1 Dil diya,
1 Dil pane k Liye,
Usne Mohabbat shikha Di,
Aur kaha Humne Ishq kiya Tha,
Tumhe Azmane k lye.
Nazar nazar me har ek naraz me hume us nazar ki talash thi. wo narazar mili to sahi par us nazar me ab wo nazar kahan thi.
Ladki Dekhi Muh Se Sitte Baje Haath Se Taali.
Ladki Dekhi Muh Sitti Baje Haath Se Taali.
Mat Krana Aaisa Mere Dosto Warna Khaoge Gaali.
Or Kehlaoge Mawaali.
Beizati Aur Biwi Ajeeb Chiz Hoti He.
Gaur Farmayega,
Beizati Aur Biwi Ajeeb Chiz Hoti He.
Achchi Tabi Lagti He Jab Dusre Ki Hoti Hai.
Pappu ki master se hui ladai,
Mastr ne ki pappu ki dhulai,
Pappu ka grm hua khoon,
Gaya kabristan aur kabr pe master ke photo tang k likh diya,
COMING Soon.
Girl: Bas Kro, Kisine Dekh Liya To,
Boy: Kuch Nahi Hoga Tum Bas
Sidhi Raho, Aur Pura Dikhao,
Thoda Aur Karne Do,
Agar Nahi Dikhaya to Mein,
Fail Ho Jauga.
Santa aur Banta B.A mein aathvi Baar Fail Ho gaye,
Santa: Chal Suicide kar le.
Banta: Saaleya Pagal Ho Gaya Hai,
Agle janam Fir NURSERY toh hi shuru karna payega.
Another quick keyboard shortcut to bring up Windows Task Manager is Ctrl+Shift+Esc. Besides bringing up Windows Task Manager while using Remote Desktop, you can also use Ctrl+Shift+Esc to bring up the task manager while working locally.
As a Kid Rajnikanth used to write,
A Personal diary today d diary s published as.
Guiness Book of World Records.
Teacher to student: Jo doosre ko apni baat na samjha sake woh gadha hota hai.
Student: Sir, kya Matlab main samjha nahi.
Santa texts his Girl friend,
Love I can't live without you, Will you marry me?
Here is the KILLING Reply,
Who’s dying now,
I lost all my contacts, kindly msg me your name.
Beh na saki wo askon ki dhara jo ankho se behni thi,
Chaha tha uska pallu pakad k roye,
Par wo kambakht us din jeans tshirt pehni thi.
Ek aap hai jo itne Achay hai,
Ek aap hai jo itne Sachay hai,
Ek aap hai jo itne Sundar hai,
Ek aap hai jo itne Caring hai,
Aur ek hum hai,
Jo Jhoot pe Jhoot bole ja rahe hai.
While playing once RAJINIKANTH said statue to a girl.
Now that girl is known as Statue of Liberty.
Ek Dum Latest And Jhakaas Way 2 Propose.
Boy: Xcuse Me
Girl: Jee Kahiye
Boy: Mere Hone Wale Bacho Ki Taraf Se
Apko Happy Mothers DAY.
Sidhu Paji: Phir aaj koi ban ke yahn mehman aaya hai,
Husan ke duniya se ishq ka paigam aaya hai,
Aur Gori ke pyar me,Hoke diwana dekho,
kareena ke pichu pichu imran Aaaya hai.
Teacher:Itne Din Se Kaha The
Boy: Birdflu tha.
Teacher:Pr ye to Birds me hota hai,
Boy: Insan Samjha Hi Kaha Aapne Roz To Murga Bana Dete Ho
Santa Ke Upar Bijli Ki Nangi Taar Gir Gayi.
Wo Bechara Tadap Tadap Ke Marne Hi Wala Tha Ki,
Usko Yaad Aaya Ki Light To 2 Din Se Band Hai.
Santa Utha Aur Kapde Jhadte Hue Bola: Sala, Faaltu Mein Hi Dara Diya.
एक पंडित की टाँग जल गयी.
डॉक्टर ने बरनोल और वियाग्रा लिख दी, पंडित बोला बरनोल तो समझ आता है पर वियाग्रा क्यों ?
डॉक्टर : उससे धोती हमेशा उँची रहेगी.
Tumhe dil main basaye rakhta hoon.
Aur duniya ko bhoolaye rakhta hoon.
Tumhe meri nazar na lag jaye,
Iss liye nazarein jukaye rakhta hoon.
Look at the SKY at 10:55 pm today.
U can see RAJNIKANT. he s participatng n ASIAN games high jump,
D0nt miss it.
Dil ki gahrio may koi gam na ho ye dosti hmari kbhi km na ho
tum sada khus rehma kya pta khi kal ham na ho.
Miss You
RAJNIKANT was supposed to play the lead role in Mission Impossible.
He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the title would not make any sense.
Girl: Now stop looking at girls,u r commited now.
Boy: Oho what do u mean,
If i m on diet,
That doesnt mean that i cant look at MENU.
Kisi kangal ladkeko koi ladki nahi chahegi to thora paisa hona bhi jaruri he
Par phirbhi paisa hi sab kuch nahi hota ladkiyan ladkon me aur bhi bahut kuch dekhti he.
Mom: School ja.
kid: Nahi jaunga.
Mom: kyun?
kid: Job kar lunga.
Mom: Nalayak beshram Class 2 mein padh k kya job karega?
kid: Class 1 ki ladkiyo ko tution padhaunga.
Girl: Aj Mat Dalo.
Boy: Kyo?
Girl: Kal Tum Daal Ke So Gaya. Bahut Dard Hua,
Me Puri Raat Maslti Rahi Or,
Pani Bhi Nikalta Raha Mujhe Lagata Hai Ye,
EYE DROPS Bekar Hai.
Kapil: Koi Aankhon se baat kar leta hai,
Koi Aankho hi aankhon mein mulaqat kar leta hai,
Bada Mushqil hota hai jawab dena,
Jab koi English mein baat kar leta hai.
Ravan: Cigarette hai kya ?
Hanuman: Nahin.
Ram: Ek packet hai na.
Hanuman: Aap chup rahiye prabhu, saale ke 10 sir hain, pura packet khatam ho jayega.
Lutero ne ladki ke zevar loot liye,
Log bole: Shukar Karo, zevar hi gaye, bhabhi ki izzat to bach gayi.
Bhabhi Chillai: Kamino,
Izzat bech bech ke hi to zevar kharide the.
1) Be polite.
2) Call people by their names.
3) Be faithful to your partner.
4) Be positive and smile often.
5) Be clear in your communication, b
6) Don’t be late.
7 Invest time, money and energy in yourself.
Ladkiya PANT ke Niche kya Pehnti he?
Vo CHAPPAL Pehenti he!
Niche pucha,Andar nahi Pucha tha!
Wife bathroom se naha ke nikli to Husband use ghur raha tha.
Wife romantic hokr : Kucch krne ka irada hai kya?
Husband 2 thappad maar ke bola : Mere garam pani se kyu nahai.
Pati: Sex ho jaye?
Wife:Nahi
Pati: Zewar la dunga
W:Nahi
Pati: Car launga
W:Nahi
Beta beech me so raha tha bola: Papa meri gand mar lo par CYCLE la do.
Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji.
Wah Wah.
Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji.
Aur
Nangu Pangu Ghumna Ho To Apki Marji.
Vajud nahi jiska wo hasti kis kam ki
Jaha dil na lage wo basti kis kam ki
Yaad aapki aaye aur hum SMS na kare
To apni ye sweet si dosti kis kaam ki.