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Hum dua karte hain Khuda se,
Ki wo aap jaisa dost aur na banaye,
Ek Cartoon jaisi cheez hai humare paas,
Kahin wo bhi common na ho jaye.
289
Ladke ne Ladki ko Aankh maari.
Ladki: Mai esi wesi ladki nahi hu.
Ladka: Wo to theek hai par check karna hamara Farz banta hai.
50
Jab aap apne partner ko kiss kar rahe ho to kisi aur chiz ke bare me na soche.
Jab aapke lips aapke partner ke lips ko touch kar rahe ho tab aap kisi bhi adhure kaam ke bare na soche.
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Kapil: Aarz kiya hai.
Daaru peene walo kabhi lassi bhi piya karo,
Priyanka Chopra: Wah Wah Wah Wah
Kapil: Free mein post padhne walo,
Kabhi like Comment bhi kiya karo.
455
Ek MuLaqat karo Humse INAYAT Samajh kar,
Har Cheez ka Hisab Dnge QAYAMAT Samaj kar,
Meri DOSTI pe Kbi Shak Na krna,
Hum DOSTI b karte Ha IBADAT Samaj kar.
690
Chota baby: Mummy raat ko jab me susu karne gaya,
To bathroom Ki light jal gayi.
Mummy: Haramjade tu aaj fir freeze me susu kar aaya.
502
Baarish ke mausam me kya apka jee machalta hai,
Kya paani me bhigne ka bhi apka dil karta hai,
Isme aapki galti nahi hai,
Ish mausam me har Mendhak aise hi fudakta hai.
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801
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Unse Milne Ko Jo Socho Ab Wo Zamana Nahi,
Ghar Bhi Kaise Jaun Ab To Koi Bahana Nahi,
Mujhe Yaad Rakhna Kahi Tum Bhula Na Dena,
Mana Ke Barson Se Teri Gali Me Aana Jana Nahi.
946
1 Baar Adnan Sami ke ghar mein chor aaya..
Adnan chor ke upar baitha aur bola Ramu police ko bula.
Ramu - Sahab chappal nahi mil rahi.
CHOR bola - Meri pehen le par jaldi jaa.
659
WhatsApp Chhote Bachho Ke Diaper Ki Tarah Hota Hai…
Hota kuchh Nahin,
Lekin har 5 Minute Me Check Karna Padta Hai!
717
Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?
Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha.
TT: Ticket hai?
Sadhu: Nahin.
TT: Chalo.
Sadhu: Kahan?
TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha, Jail mein.
41
Ek Car Ki Nilaami Ho Rahi Thi.
1 Lakh, 2 Lakh, 3 Lakh.
Santa Shocked: Iss Khataare Mein Aisa Kya Hai? Jo Itne Rate Lagg Rahe Hai?
Seller: Iss Ke 10 Accident Hue Hai Har Baar Sirf Biwi Hi Marti Hai, Husband Bilkul Sahi Salamat Rahta Hai.
Santa Khush Hoke: 10 Lakhhhh.
446
Girl goes on a date.
Worried Mother gives her Condom.
Girl Laughs n Hugs Mother & Says: Yahi soch to badalni hau Maa.
Im dating with Julie, So give me Mulie.
303
My cellphone is full of Rajnikant Messages,
And now,
I dont Need a charger.
36
Feri Wala: Chaku Chhuriyan Tej Karwalo.
Santa Hanste Huye: Kyon Bhai,Akal Bhi Tej Karte Ho Kya?
Feri Wala: haan Kyon Nahi, Ho To Le Aao.
51
Laloo Football Match Dekh Kar Bole: Etna Sara Aadmi Football Ko Laat Kyon maar Raha Hai.
Secretary: Sir Gole Karne Ke Liye.
Laloo: Sasuri Gole Hi To Hai, Or Kitna Gole Karenge.
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Santa: Yaar Yeh SENT MESSAGE Kya Hota Hai?
Banta: Ghochu,Bevkuf,
Tune Hi Sardaro Ka Naam Kharab Kia Hai.
Sent Message Matlab Khushbu Wala Msg.
398
Kapil: Tu itna bada ho gaya hai,
Aur abhi tak tujhe daadhi mooch nahi aaye?
Naukar: Main bilku apni Maa par gaya huun.
314
Kapil To Sumona: Agar Sirf Salad khane se weight kam hota.
Toh kabhi banis Ko dekha Hai?
Woh Toh Sirf Ghaans Khati Hai.
902
Itna khubsurat kaise muskura lete ho,
Itna qatil kaise sharma lete ho,
Kitni aasani se jaan le lete ho,
Kisi ne sikhaya hai ya bachpan se hi kamine ho?
53
संता एक बार बालों के साथ कंधों पर भी शैम्पू लगा रहा था.
बंता: अरे यह क्या कर रहे हो.
संता: अरे यह शैम्पू हैड एंड सोल्डर है दोनों पर लगाने के लिए.
40
दिल ने कहा कि दोस्तों को message करूं ।
Mobile उठाया,
फिर सोचा रहने दो, दिल तो पागल है।
फिर दुबारा सोचा दिल पागल है तो क्या हुआ,
दोस्त कौन से normal हैं।
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The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. Intelligence plus character that is the goal of true education.
856
Teri galiyon mein na rakhen gy kadam aaj K baad,
Kyun K,
Humari apni gali mein setting ho gai hy,
Kya,
Bacchi,
Hy Yar.
51
Santa ko mughalo ne pakad liya,
Aur use akbar ke pass le gae.
Akbar: Isko bandi bana diya jaee.
Santa: nahi nahi jahan panah.
Reham Mujhe banda hi rehne do.
40
Ladki Jab 18 Saal Ki Ho Jati Hai To,
Wo Dene Ke Liye Taiyar Ho Jaati Hai?
Vote.
Kabhi Desh Ke Baare Mein Bhi Soch Liya Karo,
Hamesha Apne Bare Mein Hi Sochte Ho.
54
Knock on wood.
479
Lesser leather never weathered wetter weather better.
665
Time dikhda Nhi par bahot kuj dikha janta h.
511
He lies down with his knees bent and legs apart, and you sort of slot in the middle at right angles to his body. With one hand on his chest, and the other on his lower leg, rock back and forth until he's hitting the right spot.
780
FB is the gym of social networking. We all join, but nobody actually uses it.
592
Maut ke aagosh mein sone ko jee karta hain,
Dil to kho diya ab zindagi khone ko jee krta hai,
Uski yaad aati hain jab bhi mujhe na jane kyon,
Kahin pe tanha baith ke roney ko jee karta hain.
431
The Greatest Value of Having Good People Around You Is Not What You Get From Them,
But The Better Person You Become By Being With Them. Good day
351
Na likha koi khat tumhe,
Na koi ikrar kiya,
Fir bhi humne tumse,
Dil hi Dil Pyar Kiya.
44
For Sharabi.
Pani ko daru bana dete,
Daru ke tanker lagva dete,
Kambakht hamne pini chod di hai.
Warna Tajmahal ko Beerbar or,
Mumtaj ko Bargirl bana dete.
61
GIRLS: Petrol Badha,
Hum Chup The,
Diesel Badha,
Fir Bhi Chup The,
LPG Badha fir bhi Kuch Nhi Bole,
But ab Golgappe 10 ke sirf 4,
Ab chup Nhi Rahenge.
41
Santa In Kaun Banega Crorepati.
Santa Ji, yeh raha aapke liye Pehla question,
Q: Sote Waqt apki Wife kaisi dikhti hai.?
A: Hot
B: Sexy
C: Cute
D: Sad
Santa: I want to use the lifeline, I Wanna Phone A Friend.
46
Teacher: Tum Ro Q Rhe Ho
Ladka: Meri Mummy Mere Papa Ko Kutta Kehti H.
Or Papa Unko Billi,
Mujhe Samajh Nhi Aata Ki Main Pilla Hu.
Ya Billa
972
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
475
Ravish his body: Enjoy his body when you’re on top of him.
Think of all the amazing things he does to you when he’s on top and repeat them.
Lick his nipples, nibble his ears or give him love bites all over his chest.
302
Girl:Meri 1-1 saans pe 1-1 Ladka Marta Hai..
Boy:"To Tum Koi Accha Sa Toothpaste
Istimaal Kyo Nahi Karti..
504
Risto me pyar ki mithas rahe,
Na Mitne wala ek Ehsas rahe,
Kahne ko to Choti si hai Jindi,
Magar lambi ho jaye agar,
Apki dosti ka sath rahe.
992
Sacchi Dosti Bejuban Hoti Hai,
Ye to Ankhon Se Bayan Hoti Hai,
Dosti Me Dard Mile to Kya Hua,
Dard Me Hi To Apne Aur Parayon Ki Pahechan Hoti Hai.
698
In India, everyone is expert about mobile problems.
However, the most common solution would be
Switch off kar ke ON kar THEEK ho jayega.
294
MBA ki wife: Eji , Yeh inflation kya hai ?
MBA: Pehle tu 36-24-36 thi , ab tu 42-40-48 hai,
Ab tere pass sab kuch pehle se jyada hai par phir bhi teri value kam hai.
Yahi INFLATION hai.
884
Ek aadmi sasural gaya,
Uski saas ne use 7 din tak Subah-sham palak ka saag khilaya.
8ve din pucha.. Beta, kya khaoge?
Aadmi bola, khet dikha do, Khud hi char aaunga.
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All mornings are like Paintings:- U need a little inspiration to get going,
A little smile to brighten up&An SMS from someone who cares to color ur day... (*) Good Morning (*
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