Jaan-pehchaan hote hi
ladko ko ladki ko whatsapp par add karne
ki itni jaldi hoti hai.. mano..
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hone wali BIWI ka Rashan Card par naam chadhwana ho!!
KAL RAT KO
MAINE
1 BHOOT
1 PRET
1 CHUDEL
KO BHEJA
THA,
APKO DARANE
KE LIYE PAR
WO SABI BEHOSH HO GAYE
KYA JARURAT THI UNKE SAMNE MUSKURANE KI...
Ajab si halat hai tere jane ke bad,
Mujhe bhukh lagti nahin khana khane ke baad,
Mere pass do hi samose the jo maine kha liye,
Ek tere aane se pehle ek tere jane ke baad.
Kuch nasha to aapki baat ka hai,
Kuch nasha to dheemi barsaat ka hai,
Hame aap yuhi sharabi na kahiye,
Yeh dil par asar to aapse mulaqat ka hai.
Arz hai-
Roz roz weight napkar kya karna hai,
ek din to sabne marna hai
char din ki h zindagi,
kha lo jee bhar ke,
Agle janam to phir 3 kilo se hi start karna hai.
संता (बंता से)-अरे यार, यह बता कि अक्ल बड़ी या भैंस?
बंता- रुक, सोचने दे जरा..(थोड़ी देर सोचने के बाद)
बंता- मुझे बेवकूफ समझा है क्या? पहले डेट ऑफ बर्थ तो बता दोनों के!
लडकियां हर मोड़ पे डरती हैं, अकेली हो तो सुनसान राहों का डर, भीड़ में हो तो लोगों का डर, हवा चले तो दुपट्टा उड़ने का डर, कोई देखे तो उसकी आँखों का डर, बचपन हो तो माँ बाप का डर, जवान हो तो भाइयों का डर, वो डरती हैं और तब तक डरती हैं, जब तक इन्हें कोई जीवन साथी नहीं मिल जाता, और यही वो शख्स होता है, जिससे वो सबका बदला लेती है ।
लड़कियों को सुगंध बहुत पसंद होती है। इसलिए जब भी आप अपनी गर्लफ्रेंड से मिलने जाएं, तो कोलोन, डिओ, परफ्यूम का इस्तेमाल जरूर करें। फिर देखिए उन पर क्या जादू चलता है।
उनके घर के पास से जब भी गुजरे उन्हें देखने की कोशिश जरुर करे. उन्हें ये एहसास दिलाना जरुरी है की आप उनमे इच्छा रखते हैं.
What Kapil Sharma Says . .
Aur Koi Bhai Bandhu Jo, Koi Sawaal Puchna Chahta Ho" ? . . . .
What He Actually Means..........
"Aur Koi Bhai Bandhu Jo Apni Bezzati Karwaana Chahta Ho"... ?
Saath agar doge muskrayenge zarur,
Pyar agar dil se karoge to nibhayenge zarur,
Raah me kitne kante q na ho,
Awaz agar dil se doge to aayenge zarur.
What is d difference between Monkey & Donkey?
Monkey will save dis message
& Donkey will delete dis message. Choice is urs…
Sabse himmat wala insan kaun hai..?
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Woh jo LOOSE MOTION me bhi GAS chodne ka
risk leta hai.....
When U Breathe, U Respire.
Wah wah
When U Breathe, U Respire !
Wah wah kya baat hai
When u Don’t Breathe, U Expire.
Subhanallah.. Maar hi daala..!!
The ultimate & the most encouraging
lesson in English Grammar:-
‘If more than one mouse is mice,
then more than one Spouse is Spice.’
All those who find their love today, Happy Valentine's Day;
And all those who don't, Happy Ballantine's Day!
Love filled Valentine Month..!!
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (65 votes, average: 3.51 out of 5)
Its d Month of
Kisses,Surprises,
Proposals n Dates,
Chocolates n Gifts,
Hugs n LuvSongs
It's feb..
Wishng u a Love filled
Valentine Month..!!
Ek DR. Se Pucha Gya
Bacche Itne Shararti Q Hote Hai?
FantaStic Jwaab Mila.
Jo cheez Bnti Hi Shararat Se Hai Wo Sharif kaise ho Sakti Hai
Rakh Le 2-4 Botal Kafan Mein;
Saath Baith Kar Piya Karenge;
Jab Mange Ga Hisab Gunahon Ka;
Ek Peg Usse Bhi De Diya Karenge!
Words Like Awesomeness, Brilliance, Legendary Etc. Were Added To The Dictionary In The Year 1949. That Was The Year Rajinikanth Was Born
1 GIRL park me bench pe baithi thi.
BHIKHARI bola-Darling,
I LOVE U
GIRL- IDIOT! mai waisi Ladki nahi hu.
BHIKHARI-phir tum mere BED par kya Kar rahi ho...
Mere Jaan Ki Jahan Se Nirali Hai Ada,
Har Andaz Hai Unka Subase Juda,
Khafa Ho Jaye To Katil Se Kam Nahi,
Mehrban Ho Jaye To Lagte Khuda.
Once rAjnikAnt apPeared in Exam of CSS
gUess wht happnd.??
failed.!!
.
beta ye CSS h
rajni ho ya gajni,sabki h bajni..
Santa Sharab Pikar
Sadhu Se Takra Gya
Sadhu Gusse Me- Aye Murkh
Me Tujhe SHRAAP Deta Hu
Santa-Rukiye Maharaj
Me Glas Leke Ata hu
Likhy Jo Khat Tujhy
Wo Teri Yaad Me
Wo Sare Padh Liye
Papa Ne Raat Me
Sawera Jab Hua Tou
Jootey Parr Gaye
Wo Raadhe Wale Baal
Ghajni Me Badla Gaye
Rajnikant - Aaj mere Kutte ne anda diya.
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Big B - Kutta kab se anda dene laga?
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Rajnikant - Ye Rajni ka style hai.
Maine apni murgi ka naam kutta rakha hai.
Munna: Kya kar rela hai circuit?
Circuit: Bhai bulb pe baap ka naam likh rela hu
Munna: Kyun!
Circuit: Bhai, baap ka naam roshan karne ka he na.
Meethe gur mein mil gaye til,
Udi patang aur khil gaye dil,
Har pal sukh aur har din shaanti,
Aap sab ke liye laaye Makar Sankranti.
Wish You Happy Makar Sankranti
Aye barish zara tham ke baras,
Jab mera yaar aa jaye to jam ke baras,
Pehle na baras ki woh aa na sake,
Phir itna baras ki woh ja na sake…
Aye barish zara tham ke baras,
Jab mera yaar aa jaye to jam ke baras,
Pehle na baras ki woh aa na sake,
Phir itna baras ki woh ja na sake…
Aye barish zara tham ke baras,
Jab mera yaar aa jaye to jam ke baras,
Pehle na baras ki woh aa na sake,
Phir itna baras ki woh ja na sake…
Aye barish zara tham ke baras,
Jab mera yaar aa jaye to jam ke baras,
Pehle na baras ki woh aa na sake,
Phir itna baras ki woh ja na sake…
Aye barish zara tham ke baras,
Jab mera yaar aa jaye to jam ke baras,
Pehle na baras ki woh aa na sake,
Phir itna baras ki woh ja na sake…
Tumse mil kar ho gaya zindagi se pyar,
Ab humein chhod kar mat jana yaar,
Bin tere hum jee na paayenge,
Tum na hoge to hum ULLU kise banayenge.
Raat ke 3 baje santa ke number par phone
aaya – Hello yaha Fatima Mehfooz rehti hai kya?
Santa : Kutte itni raat ko Fatima mere paas
hoti to mehfooz rehti kya?
Husband wife ki godh mein leta hua thaa. Wife: Kaisa lag raha hai ji.
Husband: Aise jaise bhagwaan Vishnu Shesh naag ki godh mein lete hon.
Mana Ki Tumhein Mujhse Jyada Gham Hoga,
Magar Rone Se Yeh Gham Kabhi Na Kam Hoga,
Jeet Hi Lenge Dil Ki Nakam Baaziyan Hum,
Agar Mohabbat Mein Hamari Dam Hoga….
Ladkiyan Bahut Emotional Hoti Hai Isliye Unki Emotion Ki Hamesha Sammaan Kare.
Apne Cell Phone Me Koi Romantic Ring Tone Hi Rakhe, Romantic Ring Tone Sunkar Ladkiyan Jarur Impress Hoti Hai. Ladkiyon Ko Patane Ke Liye Unhe Impress Karna Bahut Hi Jaruri Hai.
Ladki Ko Pahle Dekho Aur Wo Jab Aapke taraf Dekhe To Use Ishara kro Ki Uske Gaal Par Kuch Hai Aur Jab Wo Gaal Ko Saaf Kare To again Ishare Se Bolo Ki Iss Gaal Par Nahi dusre Gaal Par Hai, This Is Best Formula In The World..Is Tarah Se Maine Kai Ladkiyo Ko Pataya Hai.
Aaj Kuchh Sharmaye Se Lagte Ho,
Sardi Ke Karan Kapkapaye Se Lagte Ho,
Chehra Aapka Khil Utha Hai,
Hafte Ke Baad Nahaye Se Lagte Ho…
Subah subah biwi ne husband se newsaper manga...
Husband - kitni backward ho tum.....duniya kaha se kaha pahunch gyi aur tum newspaper mang rhi ho?? Ye mera TAB le lo....
Biwi ne TAB liya aur uss se cockroach mar diya..
Husband Behosh...
Moral-
Biwi jo mange...de do
Driving down a road Santa sees a sign that says, “Watch for Fallen Rocks.”
A few kilometres later, he sees some rocks at the side of the road, so he stops and picks them up.
When he gets to the next town, he carries the rocks into the Highway Maintenance office and puts them on the counter.
“Here are your fallen rocks,” he says to the man behind the counter. “Now where is my watch?”.
Ultimate Hit!!
Santa ka interview: Batao wo kaun si Aurat hain jisko 1OO% pata hota hain ki uska Husband kaha
hain?
Santa ne apna khatarnak dimag lagaya or bola
.
“Vidhwa Aurat….
We Build the world(Civil)
We create the magic(CS/IT)
We move the world(Mech/Auto)
We give power to the world (EEE)
We Connect the world n make it
smaller (EC/TC).....
... We are the World and it's creators
coz
Scientists Invent d world that
already exists...
But ENGINEERS create d world dat
never existed...
Kyun karte ho dikhawa mujhse nafrat karne ka
kyun karte ho koshish mujhse dur jane ka
hai mohabbat tere dil main mere liye pata hia mujhe
fir karte ho kyun koshish isse chupane ka
Eyes are the way to love... !!!
Heart is the heaven of love... !!!.
Dreams are the outcome of love... !!!
Heartbeats are the music of love... !!!
BUT dont forget that..... ...
TEARS are the result of LOVE... !!
Yadein rukti nahi rok pane se...
Dil manta nahi kisi k samjhane se...
Ruk jati hai dhadkan AP ko bhul jane se...
Hum apko yaad karte hai saans lene k bahane se,......
Mitti ki anokhi moorat ho tum,
Zindagi ki ek zarurat ho tum,
Phool to khubsurat hote hai, lekin..
Phoolon se bhi khubsurat ho tum.
Wo pareshan to karti Hai magar rulati nahi
Itni achi he ki kabhi satati nahi
Humne pucha pyar karti ho humse?
Hans k boli karti to hu magar jatati nahi...