STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Na daro meri jaan aapko hai rab ka vaasta,
Kadam badao dil ki taraf milega pyar ka raasta,
Pyar ki raho mein ho sakta hai gum ka andhera,
Par pyar ki manzil pe hi hoga dil ka savera.
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Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
A: The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
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Mana Hum Itne Sweet Nahi K Diabetes Ho Jaye.
Nahi Itne Salty ki BP Badh Jaye, Nahi Itne Testy Ki Habbit Ban Jaye,
Aur Hum Itne Kardwe Bhi Nahi Ki Yaad Hi Naa Aaye
Miss You
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Agar Marvadi Girls Papita beche to Hum Ladko ko Bhot Fayda hoga?
Kyuki Ladkio ko ye aawaz lagani Hogi: Pappi to le lo,
Pappi to le lo.
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Anil Kapoor’s family lived in Raj Kapoor’s garage when they first moved to Mumbai. Later they shifted to a room in one of Mumbai’s middle class suburbs.
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Ladke ne Ladki ko Aankh Maari
Ladki: Mai Esi Wesi Ladki Nahi Hu ..
Ladka: Wo To Theek Hai Par Check Karna Hamara Farz Banta Hai
41
Teacher: Ganga, yamuna, Kaveri, Krishna, Bharat ki
Nadiyo ke Naam Hai to Pakistan ki Nadiyo ke Naam Batao??
Pappu: Rukhsana, Farzana, Rizwana, Sultana, Shabana
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Doctor Mareej se bola: Agar tum meri dawa se theek ho gaye to mujhe kya inaam doge?
Mareej: Main kabra khodta hoon, Aapki kabra free mein khod dunga.
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Pyar Wo Nhi Jisme Jeet Or Haar Ho,
Pyar Wo Nhi Jisme Izhar Or Inkar Ho,
Pyar Wo He Jisme Kisi Ki Ummid Na Ho,
Lekin Fir B Uska Intezar Ho.
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Mam: Agr Koi School Ke Samne Bomb Rkh Deta Hai to Kya Kroge?
Bacha: 1,2 Min Dkhenge
Agr Koi Le Jata Hai To Theek Hai, Warna
Staff Room Me Rkh Denge
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Tohfe me mat gulab lekar aana,
Kabar me mat chirag lekar aana,
Bahut pyasa hu yaaro barso se,
Aana to ROYAL STAG aur Disposal
Wale GLASS lekar aana.
44
I was just told that my dog chased someone on a bicycle and bit him.
That's bullshit, my dog can't even ride a bicycle.
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Government of India has
introduced a new rule...
Good looking people should be
thrown out of country!!!
U r safe..oh! No where should I Hide??
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Girl: Main Tumhe Apna Dil Nahi DE sakti.
Me: Main. Itni Upar Ki Soch Bhi Nahi Raha Hu.
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He'll love it, because the view is great and you should like it because you're in charge.
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Samne na ho to tarshti hai aankhe,
Bin aapke bahut barsti hai aankhe,
Mere liye na sahi inke liye MSG kar do,
Qki aapka MSG bade pyar se padhti hai ye aankhe.
47
SANTA: Bhiga Sa Lagta Hai Alam Mujhe,
Bhigi Si Lagti Hai Subah Mujhe,
Bhiga Lag Raha Hai Sara Jaha Mujhe.
BANTA: Uth Sale,Bistar Per Susu Kr Diya Hai Tune.
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Teacher to Electronics Students: NAADE ko english me kya kehte hain?
1 Student: PHD.
Teacher: Kya matlab?
Student: Pajama Holding Device.
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Interviewer : Sabse Zada Barf Kaha Girti Hai?
Student : Daru Ke Glass Me.
241
Sath agar doge to muskarayenge zarur,
Dosti agar dil se karoge to nibhayenge zarur,
Kitne b kate kyu na ho raah me awaz agar doge to ayenge zarur.
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Santa 2 Wife: Jaanu Coke Peene k Baad Kuch Karney,
Ko Dil Chah Raha hai?
Wife: Sharmate Hue Karo na Jee.
Santa: BrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrr.
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At an altitude of 2,444 meters, the Chail Cricket Ground in Chail, Himachal Pradesh, is the highest in the world. It was built in 1893 and is a part of the Chail Military School.
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The funny thing about short cut is that it might probably end up as wrong cut.
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I miss the way things used to be, when you would say I Love You
And then smile at me like i was the,
Only thing that ever meant anything to You,
I MISS THAT.
406
One who somes, has a SMOKY heart,
One who drinks, has an ALCOHOLIC heart.
So dear U must STOP eating SWEETS,
As u r already a SWEETEHART.
878
Mobile ek MANDIR hai.
Whatsapp uska DEVTA.
Group Banane Wala PUJARI.
Message Bhejne Wala DANI.
Padhane wala BHAKT.
Aur Reply Na Karne Wala,
Bhikhari.
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Turning up late
Unless you have a very good excuse and ring ahead to rearrange, turning up late for an appointment will not endear you to any employer.
Poor body language
Eye contact, good posture, a cheerful demeanour and a firm handshake will get you a long way in an interview.
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Savita Bahut Dino Baad Mayke Jaa Rahi Hun
Pati: Kuch chahiye
Savita: apna L*nd Kat K Dedo
Muje Maza bhi aata Rahega aur aap Par shak bhi nahi Hoga
822
एक लड़का एक लड़की के साथ बैठा था,
दूसरे दिन दूसरी लड़की के साथ बैठा था,
तीसरे दिन तीसरी लड़की के साथ बैठा था…
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इस कहानी से तुम्हे क्या शिक्षा मिलती है.
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लड़कियां बदल जाती हैं पर लड़के नहीं।
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Sehwag Was Bowling … He Bowled A Perfect Ball But Umpired Shouted …”NO BALL”
Q ???
Umpire Beimaan Tha ???
No …
Socho…
Aray Yaar Ball Was Fine But Umpire Just Commented On His Hair … “NO BAAL”
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Sir-"Samundar Mein Nimbu ka Ped Ho To Tum Kaise Todoge?"
Santa-"Chidiya Bankar."
Sir-"Aadmi ko Chidiya Tera Baap banayega!"
Santa-"Samundar Mein Ped Aapka baap lagayega!"
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Mere honton se tere honton ko geela kar du
Tere honto ko mein aur bhi raseela kar du
Tu es kadar pyar kare ke pyar ki inteha ho jaye,
Tere honto ko chus kar tuje or n joshila kar du
39
Intezaar ki aarzoo ab kho gayi hai.
khamoshiyon ki aadat ho gayi hai.
Na shikwa raha, na shikayat kisi se.
agar hai toh ek mohabbat,
jo In tanhaiyon se ho gayi hai …
762
Exam Question: How to Kill an Ant..? (10marks)
Student’s Answer:
Mix Chili Powder with Sugar & Keep it outside the Ant’s Home..
After eating Ant will search for Water..
Somewhere near Water Tank., Push Ant into it!
Now Ant will go to dry herself near fire,
When It reaches near Fire, Put a Bomb into Fire..
Then U Admit wounded Ant in ICU..
Remove Oxygen mask from Its Mouth & kill the Bloody Ant.
Humse panga!
10 marks k liye hum teacher ko maar de, cheenti kya hai.
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Phoolon ki wadiyon me basera ho aapka,
Taron ke aangan me khubsurat savera ho aapka,
Duaa hai meri ye apne dost ke liye,
Humse bhi pyaara naseeb ho aapka…
Happy Birthday
260
Bhai Suna ki kal raat 4 gundo ne aapki kanpati pe gun rakh ke pucha-
-Goli maru
-Ya Gaand?
Aaj aap ko whatsapp pr online dekh ke khushi ho rahi hai..
Good Decision
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