STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Sir: Angrezo Ne CHAND par PANI
aur BARAF ki Khoj kar li hai.
Batao isse tumne kya sikha
Student: Bas humein ab sirf DAARU
aur NAMKEEN Leke Jana hai…
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Aaj kal 2 chezain sirf qismat waloonko milty hai
1: Jungle main ghomta huwa white hathi.
2: Without affairs wala Jeevan sathi.
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Ek Class Men Girls Aur Boys
Ka Shair O Shayri Ka Mukabla Tha
Girls: Hum Tumhai Hara ke Dikhayen ge..
Boys: Hum Haar Gaye.. Jaldi Dikhao..
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Mene maa se pucha kab tak mere liye
es tarah raato ko jagti rahogi.
Maa ne kaha jab tak tu raaton mein
apni dusri maao se baat karna band nai kar deta.
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BANTY- Tuje aisa kab laga ki,
Ab tuje bhagwan bhi nahi bacha sakta
BABLU- Jab loose motions ho aor PAIJME ka NADA na khule.
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1 Ladka Ladki se puchta hai:
Bache kaise hote hain?
Sharmao mat batao.
Ladki Chup…
Ladka: Arey pagli itna bhi nahi pata,
Bache shararati hote hain.
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Tailor Larki Ka Naap Letay Hoye:
Koi Boyfriend Ha?
Girl: Han Ha Kio?
Tailor: Usay kehna K Thora Right Walay Pr Bhi Dehan Do,
Fitting Sahi Nhi Aa Rahi.
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Bacha Chest pe hath rak k pencil uthne k liye jhuka
Baap: Chest pe hath kyu rkha?
Bacha: School me madam bina hath rakhe juki thi to fefde bahar aagaye
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A tourist from United States comes to visit India and he sees a sardar. He asked a question to him:
Tourist: Any great men born in this village?
Sardar: No sir, only small babies!!!
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Sardar: Station jaane k kitne rupey loge?
Autowala: 100 rupey.
Sardar: 30 lelo.
Autowala: 30 me koun leke jayega?
Sardar: tum piche bheth jao Mein leke jaunga.
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Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?
Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!
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Que. – What is the perfect example of both Good & Bad Luck?
Ans. – The naughty wind blows the girl’s skirt high (Good luck)
but at the same time …
Dust falls into the boy’s eyes (Bad luck)…
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HR in office : Okay guys,today we are going to play a game.
When I say a name of the fruit, you run to the right side of the hall.
And when I say any color, you run to the left side of the hall.
One who is wrong will not get the increment...
got it ?
Employees : Yes, Got it.
HR : Okay...Ready,
ORANGE !
Employees : ????
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One boy went to meet his girlfriend
When he came back at home
Mom asked
kahaan gaey they ?
Boy:us se milney
Mom: kis liye?
Boy: haan bohat kiss liye:D
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Namaskar Ye MALE/FEMALE jaanch sewa hai,
Ager Aap purush hai to 2 msg kare,
Mahila hai to 3 kare,
En me se kuch nahi hai to SMS na kare hum aap ka dard samjhte hain..!!
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Why Hindu Law doesn't permit second marriage?
Answer:- Indian Constitution article 20(2) says: "No human can be punished twice for the same offence".
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Girl: Main tere liye sab kuch chhod dungi. Boy:Maa baap Girl:Yes Boy:Bhai behan Girl:Yes Boy:Khana peena Girl:Yes Boy:Star plus Girl: Muh sambhal ke baat kar !!
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Makan Malik : Rs 700 kiraya hoga.
Kirayedar : Thik hai. Lekin aapke makan me chuhey nach rahe hai.
Malik : To saale 700 me kya Sheela nachegi?
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Santa : Yaar aaj mein bus ke peeche peecha daudkar three rupees bacha liye.
Banta : Kya yaar, tum to bahut murkh ho, agar taxi ke peeche bhagte to 100 rupees bachta!
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Ek teacher ne ek student se pucha Automatically ka kya matlab hota h. Student -jab ek ganji aurat auto me beth ke jati h to use auto mein takli kehte h.
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1 Pathan Cinema mai Film dekh raha tha.
.
Film mai 1 Shair dowarty howe araha tha.
.
Pathan ne dekha tu dar gia, owr apni chadir kandhy pa dal kar bhaagny laga
Logo ne kaha: Khan Sahib mat daro, yai tu film hai
.
Pathan: Wo tu mujh ko bhi pata hai ke yai film hai, lekin wo tu janwar hai, usko kia pata
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Boy-I fell in love wit u the minute i saw
u.
wil u marry me?
Girl-Hindi me bol muje english na ati...
Boy-Aaj shayad barish hogi, aisa lag
raha hai
behan..
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Girl: Mujhe Ek Aisa Shohar Chahye
Jo Achi Achi Baten Karein,
Hansi Mazaq Karey,
Aur Raton Ko Bahar Na Jae!
Boy: Tumhein Shohar Nahi FM Radio Chahye.
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Ek Sales Manager tension mai tha.....
Distributor : Kya hua, Sahab ??:
Manager : 6 months se tour pe hoon, aur kal pata chala wife pregnant ho gayi hai "
Distributor : Ab pata chalega, bina order k maal aata hai to kaisa lagta hai...
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Ek Sales Manager tension mai tha.....
Distributor : Kya hua, Sahab ??:
Manager : 6 months se tour pe hoon, aur kal pata chala wife pregnant ho gayi hai "
Distributor : Ab pata chalega, bina order k maal aata hai to kaisa lagta hai...
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Jindgi mai ek baat yad rakhna
Ansu phochne wale bahot milenge
Par naak phochne koi nahi ata
Ishliye hamesha rumaal sath rakho….!!!
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Ek Sales Manager tension mai tha.....
Distributor : Kya hua, Sahab ??:
Manager : 6 months se tour pe hoon, aur kal pata chala wife pregnant ho gayi hai "
Distributor : Ab pata chalega, bina order k maal aata hai to kaisa lagta hai...
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Man at medical store:I need poison
Chemist: I can't sell you that
Man shows his marriage certificate
.
.
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Chemist: Oh! sorry,
I didn't knew u had a prescription.
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Did You Know . . .?
That
"HEELS" Are Man's Invention
To Make It Harder For A
Woman To Run Away.
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Breaking News
ATM @ Gulshan-e-Iqbal Is Jammed &
Not In Working Condition
.
.
.
Because
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.
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Sardar's Wife Put Hair pin In Machine
When It Said", Enter Ur PIN" ;)
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Birthday par koi wish nahi
karta..
.
.
Lekin result Par Dada ki mausi
ki beti ki nanand
ke bhai ka phone bhi aa jata hai
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "The driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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Pati Biwi ka Boob daba kar bola-
Aagr ye khde hote to BRA ki jarurt nahi hoti
Biwi pati ka Popt Pakdh ke boli:
Ye thoda aur mota hota to padhosi ki jarurt nahi hoti
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Plz call me,
its urgent.
Ek accident ho gaya hai.
.
.
.
.
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Aap ka hi blood group chahiye,
Plz mana mat karna
.
.
Warna
.
.
GADHA mar jayega
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Feeling bored?
Wondering, what to do?
Open the zip!
Enter your hands in between your zip..
take out your..
book from your bag and study.
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Police Wala Apne Bache Se:
Beta: Tumhara Result Acha Nahi Aya Aj Se Tumhara Khelna T.V Dekhna Band.
Bacha: Ye 50 Rs Pakdo Or Is Bat Ko Yahi Daba Do..
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Malinga ki Maa ne ek din us se kaha..
Beta:Ja apne bal cut kar ke aaja,
Malinga ne kaha kun kia baat hai,
Maa:Beta bartan dhone ka Scruber khatm ho gaya hai...
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2 CHUHE Bike pe ghum rahe the. Tabhi SHER ne lift mangi.
To 1 CHUHA khada hokar bola- soch le teri Maa fir kahegi ki
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.
. .
Gundo ke sath ghumne laga hai aaj-kal."
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Rose is Laal,
Sky is Neela &
Your mind is Khali Pateela.
Sorry Bura lga kya?
COFFEE is Hot,
Water is Cool,
I'm Smart & You're Fool.
Lo or Bura Maan lo...
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Wo kaunSa Department hai Jisme girls Kaam Nahi kar Sakti?
STUDENT: Fire Brigade
TEACHER: Wo Q?
STUDENT:girls ka Kaam AAG Lagaana hai,Bujaana Nahi..
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Teacher;
Baccho, Ek"Aisa
Sentence Banao
Jis Me
.
Urdu, Hindi,
Punjabi Aur
English Ka Sahi
Prayog Hua Ho,
*
Student;
"ISHQ DI GALI
WICH NO ENTRY"
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Ek Family "Sholay" Dekh K Aayi Or Pati Ne Patni Se Romanticaly Bola "Nach Basanti Nach"
Child Added- "Mummy Is Kutte K Samne Mat Nachna"...
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Attitude Rockz:
Maa Bete Se: Uth jaa
kambakht
dekh suraj kab ka nikal aya
hai Beta: To kya hua maa
wo sota bhi to mujse pehle
hai..
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Girl-1: Tujhe kaisa pati chahiye?
Girl-2: Mujhe Crorepati chaiiye.
Girl-1: Crorepati na miley to?
Girl-2: 50 lakh ke 2 pati chaleñge.
Girl-1: 50 lakh ke na miley to?
Girl-2: 25 lakh ke 4 pati bhi chaleñge.
UPPER birth pe soya hua Pappu bola:
JAB YE 1000 RUPAYE PE AAYE TO MUJHE UTHA DENA..!
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Dava & daru me kya diffrance hai?
Dava girl friend hai..
"jisme expiry date hoti hai"
aur
daru wife hai...
"jitni purani hogi utna sir chadke bolegi...
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Teacher-Baccho Kabir, Rahim, Mira ka
Koi doha sunao.
Student-Ganga ke ghat pe ghtna ghti
Gambhir, Rahim liye Mira ki pappi or
Pakde gye Kabir.
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Master Ji Bacche ka lunch kha ke
bole:
Beta, ghar jakemera naam to
nahi bataoge?
Baccha (Masumiyat se):
Sir, main Mummy se bol dunga,
Ki Roti Kutta kha gaya.
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बीवियां माफिया से भी ज्यादा
खतरनाक होती हैं …
क्योंकि …
माफिया को आपके पैसे या जिंदगी
में से कोई एक चीज़ चाहिए रहती है…
…
…
जबकि बीवी को दोनों ….
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What is d difference between Monkey & Donkey?
Monkey will save dis message
& Donkey will delete dis message. Choice is urs…
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