STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Sabdhan .....????
Jo apne Girl friend ko CHAND samajhte hai wo dhayan rakhe ki...
chand par abse pahale 17 log chad chuke hai aur usme ek kutta bhi tha Ab age apki marji ..!
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Tange uthake karo
Tange failake karo
Ghuma ghuma ke karo
Saanse rok ke karo
Jitna karoge utna 'halka' mahsus hoga
Baba Ramdeo ka YOGA
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Santa ki wife Tours & Travels magazine padhte huye :- Is baar 2nd honeymoon ke liye GREECE trykaren..?
Santa: - Kyon..?
Sarso ke tel me kya kharabi hai..?
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Child:papa aunty ka pait kion phola hai?
Father:tujhey sub pata hai!
Child: nahin pata promise!
Father: in k pait main pani bhara hay
CHILD:Oh No! Bacha to doob jaye ga!
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Pintu Pappu Ki Wedding Main: Are pappu Ye Bhabhi Gumsum Kyun Hai, Koi Muskaan Nahi Hai, Koi Tenshion Hai Kya??
Funny Pappu: Haan Yaar Isne Iske Baap Se Lipstick Laane Ke Liye Kaha Tha, saale Ganje Ne
Fevistick Laakar Pakda Di..
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Miya: Khud Ke Double Bed Ki Marammat Kara Raha Tha, Usne Marammat Karne Waale Se Kaha Ki Double Bed Majboot Aue Tikau Bana Mujhe Apni Bibi Ke Saath Is Par Sona Hai
Man: Haan Sir, Itna Majboot Banunga Ki aap Poore Mohalle Ki Biwion Ke saath So Sakte Hain.
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Ek Baar Ek Mahila Party Main Ek Gynecologist Doctor Se, Doctor Sahab Pehchana Aapne Meri Delivery Ki Thi.
Doctor: Abe Chup Kar Main Chehre Se Kisi mahila Ko nahi Jaanta.
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Nani (to a kid): Soja DIPLOMA soja!Padosan: diploma kyo bulati ho isse?Nani: Meri ladki College DIPLOMA lene gayi thi,ye leke aa gayi..!!
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Kisi condom company ne world-cup ko sponser kiya hota to uski advt me aise likh te....
Cover your STUMP.Before you PUMP
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Husband :plz. KARNE dona
Wife :nahi
Husb :PAKADNE to do
Wif :nahi
Hus :DABANE to do.
Wif :nahi
Hus :sirf DIKHAO to sahi.
Wif :nahi aaj to REMOTE pakadne nahi dungi uske BUTON bhidabane nahi dungi aur MATCH bhi dekhne nahi dungi.
Aj to sirial hi chalegi.Aisa aap ke sath bhi hota hoga na
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A girl gets a pimple,
Her friends: Use Himalayas cream sweety !!
A guy gets a pimple,
His Friends : Aur hila bc..
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MOM- Tujhko ladka pasand aaya..
BETI- Ladka to thik hai,par mota bahut hai.
MOM- Dekho beti,TV chaahe 14 inch ka ho ya 29 ka,remote toh 6 inch hi hota hai na.
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Wife: aaj phirse billi doodh peekar chali gayee!
Husband: tumhe kitni baar kaha hai, bra pahenke soya karo.
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Girl : Bus karo rat ke 12 baje se kar rahe ho,subha ho gai hai thake nahi kya..
BOY : ye to kuch b nahi he Ab to me din rat karunga q k. Muje 30000sms free he
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Girl to boy: Tum ladke kisi Ladki me sub se pehle kya dekhte ho....
Boy: Yeh to depend karta hai ki Ladki aa rahi hai ya ja rahi hai..!
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Boy: bhai saab ek condom dena girl friend ko gift dena he Shopkeeper: is pe gift cover chadhadu Boy: are yahi to cover he gift to mere paas he.
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BacHa KaIse PaIDa Hota HaI
KaLI GHas Ka zunD
usKe BIcH 1LaMBI c SunDH
usMe Se taPKI 2BunDaB AaGe Ka JawaB tu KHuD DHuDH:
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A kid wrote to Santa Claus: Send me a brother! Santa wrote back: Send me ur mother
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Boys Ki SALARY Or Girl Ka PERIODS
Ek Jesi Hoti he.
30din Me 1bar Aati He Or
5-6 Din Me Khatam Ho Jati He.
Late Aye To Tension OR Na Aaye To
Samjho Watt Lag Ga
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Sali: Jija ji 500 rs. dedo, agley hafte doongi…
Jija: 1500 lele par abhi de..
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Husband: kash hamare ladki ki jagah ladka ho jata?
Wife: Chhodo ji, agar main aapke bharose rehti, to ladki bhi nahi hoti.
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Viagra is now available in powder form to put in your tea.
It doesn’t enhance your sexual performance, but it does stop your biscuit going soft!
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“Ek bar ek baccha class mein aane ko late ho gaya.
Teacher gusse se: Kya tumhe period miss hone ka zara bhi ehsas nahi hai.
Ladka: Mam, bahut ehsas hai mujhe. Ek bar meri sister ne meri mom ko kaha ki mujhe period nahi aaye. Yeh sun kar meri maa behosh ho gayi, daddy ko heart attack ho gaya aur hairani ki baat hai hamara driver kaam chod ke baag gaya.”
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Ek ladki ne 400 meter race me ladko ko aaram se hara diya. Saheli: Tune ye kaise kiya? Ladki: Mein pichhe se skirt uthake bhagi koi aage hi nahi gaya.
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“Train main wife husband se boli:Aaj suhagrat hai kuch karo na.
Pati bola: Dekha nahin samne kya likha hai?”"”"CHALTI TRAIN MAIN CHADNA MANA HAI”"
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Vermaji ke khet ke tamatar bahot laal hote the.
Padosan ne puccha to vermaji ne kaha – “Madam me roz subah aadha nangaa ho ke paani deta hu, isi liye sharm se laal ho gaye…! ”
Padosan ne bhi apne khet me aisa hi kiya…. Tamatar to laal nahi hue, par …..
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par…….
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baigan lambe ho gaye.
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Two friends watching Bungee Jumping.
1st friend: Do u wanna try?
2nd friend: No way! I was born bcoz a rubber broke… Don’t want to die for the same reason!!!
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Santa ka bura din..
Darwaza khola….
Kundi haath mein.
Paani khola….
Nal haath mein.
Suitcase uthaya….
Handle haath mein.
Ab Santa soch raha hai….
Su-Su karu ki nahi ….
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Biwi raat m kpde utrte hue
tirchi nzar se Santa ki traf dekte hue boli:
Pta h na kya krna h?
Santa: teri aisi ki taisi
M itni rat ko kpde nhi dhounga.
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I don’t know why people hate Porn Movies ?
Although it is the most Positive Movie
No Murder
No War
No Fight
No Cheating
Lots of Love & always a very Happy Ending for all Charcters AND the Best part “jahan se dekho saali muvi wahin se samajh aa jati hai..!!
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Mangta hun to deti nahi ho….,
Jawaab meri baat ka!!
Aur deti ho to khada ho jata hai,
Rom-Rom jazbat ka!!
Muh me lena tumhe pasand nahi….,
Ek bhi qatra sharab ka!!
Fir kyu bolti ho ke dheere se daalo..,
Balon mein phool gulab ka!!
Woh sothi rahi mein karta raha….,
Intezaar uske jawab ka!!
Abhi uske haath mei rakha hi tha ke usne pakad liya…., Guldasta gulabon ka!!
Usne kaha peeche se bilkul nahi, aage se karo….,
Deedar mere husn-e-shabbab ka!!
Usne kaha bada maza aata hai jab andar jata hai,
Kaano mein ek ek lafz tere pyar ka!!
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French girl to her boyfriend:-
I’m feeling so horny
“Make love to Me”
German wife to her Husband:-
I’m so drunk
“Fuck Me”
American girl to her Husband:-
I saw porn today
I’m ready.
“Take Me”
Indian wife to her Husband:-
Aaj maine sir pe tel lagaya hai, aur baby ne bhi mere upar shaam ko su-su kar dia tha… Agar kuch karna hai to kar lo,, sab nipta ke main ek hi baar Naha lungi..
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abli – Teacher Teacher! ‘Bus’ Male
hai ya Female ?
(Teacher thinks ‘such a cute question)
Suddenly another kid (Bunty) replied-
Teacher, Teacher It’s Female
Babli-Why?
Bunty-Kyoki Sab Log Uspe Chadte
Hain, Idiot.
Teacher got tensed with answer
whereas
Babli In Doubt again-Agar Bus Female
Hai Aur Sab Uspe Chadte Hain To
Uske Bacche- Kyo nahi hote ?
Teacher more tensed…
Bunty again with answer-Kyoki Sab Us
Par Peeche Se Chadte Hai duffer.
Teacher sharm se pani pani.
But Babli still in doubt-Maana Sabhi
Peeche Se Chadte Hain, par Driver
Aur Conductor To Aagay Se Chadte
Hain. Phir Bachche -Kyon Nahin Hote?
Teacher Ki Saanse band.
Bunty’s final reply-Kyon Ki Woh Dono
Topi pehanke Chadte Hain.
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Teacher Behosh
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Ek dhaba Mein …
PATI Ne ek BANANA SHAKE
& PATNI Ne do Mosambi juice piya.
Counter Pe Payment K Time
Waiter Ne Aawaz Di:
Bhaiya Ka 1 Kela ,
Aur Bhabhi Ka do Mosambi Kaat lena.
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1st frnd to 2 Friend’
“Lay mithai kha!”
2nd Friend: Kis baat ki?
1st frnd:
Teri Bhabhi call centre me job karti hai,
aur usko Best “CALL GIRL” ka Award mila hay!
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Most confusing double meaning joke.
Girl: Aaj office jate hi boss mujpe chad gaya!
Friend : Q???
Girl: Main “late gayi” thi..
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Dudhwala Continuously Ringing Door Bell.
Lady from Inside:
Bhaiya kitna Dabaoge
Ab bas bhi karo.
Tumse accha To Paperwala hai;
Chupchap Neeche se Daal Deta hai
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Lady to Rikshawala “…under tak jaayega?”
rikshawalla “bilkul jaayega madam, aapke liye toh khada kiya hai.”
lady “thik hai toh..ghumake phicche se le lo….
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Ladkiyon SE kya D0STI karna, Jo PAL bhar mein CHH0D jati HAI,Dosti KARNI hai to LADK0 se KAR0, Jo MARNE ke BAAD bhi KANDHE pe LE jate HAI.Plz SEND all B0YS……
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Teacher: Pappu batao, yeh sign (%) tumne kaha dekha…….
Awsme answer by Pappu:Teacher ji, jab car me ladkiya sit belt pehnti hain Tab
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Bewafa To Use Kehte Hai Jo Wafa Nahi Karte,
Agar Tumse Pyar Na Hota To Tumhe Bewafa Kaise Kehte,
Phir Bhi Tumne Mere Pyar Ka Aisa Sila Diya Hai,
Ke Tumhe Bewafa Kehna Bhi Bewafai Ki Tauheen Hoti Hai.
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Oh no Dr. please jaldi karo
oh no blood?
oh ahhhhh bahut dard ho raha hai
jaldi nikaalo na
Dr. yeh lo nikaal dia.....
khuda daant ka dard bhi kissi ko na de.
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App Mujhay
Aik jaga
Se bohat
Pyare
Lagtay hain.?
Malooum hai kahan Se ?
DOOR SE.
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BOY: poora under gaya?
GIRL: ouch...... haaan
BOY:tight hay zyada lug tou nahi raha na?
GIRL:haan thora thora.
Boy: oye maqsood baji ko 8 number wala joota dikha.
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It's the thing that satisfies
ur mind, body & soul!
Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!
It's called Prayer!
God bless ur naughty mind.
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Girl: O Bhai Jaan! Zara side pe hona
Boy: Tum Larkiyan itna Confuse kyu karti ho?
Ya to 'BHAI' bolo
Ya phr "JAAN" kaho.
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Shahid KapoOR ka Saif Ali Khan Se 2 Inch Chota Tha,
iSi Liay Kareena Ne Usay Chor Dia.
I M Talking Abt ?KADD?
So Plz Al? U Guyz Improve Ur. .
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?HEIGHT?
Otherwise Ur G.f Will Prove Az Kareena KapoOR.
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America aur karachi me sirf ek fark hai.
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America me log english bolte hain,
Aur karachi me urdu.
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Paapi insaan tum kya soch rahe te.
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FiLL iN THE BLANKS:
__LANDPAR__ CHOOT.
Any Idea?
NO!
Don't Think Wried!
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Answer is
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PTCL LAND LINE PAR 50% CHOOT.
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Bazaar wali Nazuk si,
Office wali Naram Naram,
Mohallay wali Patli si,
Ghar wali Garma Garam,
Wese Aap kahan ki Roti pasand kartay ho??
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