STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Girl: Dua karo main Fail ho jaon..
Friend: Kyun?
Girl: Abbu ne kaha hai ke..
1st aayi To LAPTOP..
2nd aayi To MOBILE Aur
Fail Ho gayi to Shadi karva doon ga!!
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Line marne ke anek tarike hai..
Jinme se kuch is prakr hai..
1. pen se
2. pencl se
3. marker se..
Sabko apni trah samja hai
kya kuch log sarif bhi hote hai..!!
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It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone,
an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone,
But it takes a lifetime to forgot someone ..
Once my mom forgot me in a parking lot
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Pandit ka totta roz ek admi ko dekhta aur bolta…
“Aur kamine kya haal hai tera” us
admi ne pandit se shikayat ki to pandit ne totte ko danta…
Agle din jb wo admi totte ke paas se gujra to totta kuch na bola…
Kuch aage ja k jb us admi ne piche ghumkr totte ki tarf
dekha to totta hste hue bola…
“SAMAJH TO TU GYA HI HOGA.
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Practice makes man prefect,
Then what about Women????
Any guesses????
She is born perfect
Moral: Moral voral kuch nahi,
Bas ladkiyon ko Accha lage..
Isi liye Msg kar diya
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He said to me: I LOVE YOU
I said…. Oh my GOD!!!!
What a co-incidence!
I love myself too!!
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Likho to paigam kuch aise likhna
ke qalam bhi rone par majboor ho jaaye
har lafz me wo dard bhar do..
ke padne wala disprin kha ke so jaaye
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Kanjusi ke sare record tod dete ho,
Bhikhari ka bhi rukh mod dete ho,
Mahan hai aapki kanjusi..
Jo toilet ke lote mein bhi pani chhod dete ho!
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Khuda bachaye magroor biwi se,
Purane tv se,
Dubai k shekh se,
Nai ki shave se,
Aurat ki bewafai se,
Purani mithai se,
Haram ki kamai se,
Aur aap ki jadai se.
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Agar manjil ko pana hai to himmat sath rakhna..
Agar pyar ko pana hai to aitbar sath me rakhna..
Agar hamesha hasna hai to??
BARUSH aur PASTE sath mein rakhna!!
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Pagal hai wo log jo pyar mein kisi ko miss karte hain,
Karna hai to macharoun ko miss karo..
Jo jaan hateli par rakhkar aap ko kiss karte hain!
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Damm True.
Fact of GOOGLE:
50% of the people use it well… as a search engin
the other 50% of the people use it
to check if their internet is
connected or not
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The Funniest Situation in Student Life:
When u have No idea what to Write
in the Paper & the Examiner Comes & Says..
*Plz Hide ur Answer Sheet*
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Dil do kisi ek ko magar nek ko
Jab tak sucha dildar na mile
Try karo har ek ko.
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Side effect of excess study:
A guy went to restaurant,
He wanted to see the menu but
He forgot what it is called he ask waiter,
Syllabus lana…!!!
1
Mat chhino college ke baccho se mobile,
ye akele rehne se darte hai,
le lo exam bhi FACEBOOK par..
kyun ki ye ek hi chiz to hai jo mann lagakar use krte hae
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Mr. DAD your wife hit me badly..
i am not gonna stay with u anymore.
Dont try to stop me or butter me with a toy plane,
i need my barbie doll bye.
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Pinki- Tmhare Papa kitne saal ke hai!!
Pappu- Jitne saal ka mai hu.
Pinki- Kaise!!
Pappu- Jis din mai paida huwa usi din to wo papa bane..
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PYAR means
P = Phone karna..
Y = Yaad karna..
A = Azadi khona..
R = Rote rehna, ke kaash phone aaye!!
Unko hamari yaad aaye..
So dont PYAR :
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Ek aurat ne anna hazare se pucha..
Baapu aap roj roj anshan per kyun baith jate ho..??
Anna hazare:- Kya karu o ladies..
Main hu aadat se majboor.. Ha Ha
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Hum kal Raat aasmaan
Pe tumhare lie sitare lene gaye.
Par khali hath wapas aa gaye..
Jante Ho
Kyu
Kyu ki
Jhola to gher per hi bhool gaye the
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3 College Rules:
1) Be quiet in class bcoz other are sleeping.
2) Dont forget to carry ur book bcoz it work as pillow.
3) Keep the college clean…. So always be Absent.
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Biwi gusse mein:
Dekh lena tumhe nark mein bhi jagah nahi milegi.
Santa: Theek hai main har jagah tumhare saath jaana bhi nahi chahta!
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Soch raha hu ki daru chhod du…
Par
?
Kiske pass chhodu..
Sabhi dost to kamine hai mere..
New year ke pehle hi pee jayenge
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Sharabi ke antim samay par bhagwan bole koi aakhiri khwahish…?
Sharabi- Prabhu,
Agli bar 3 liver laga k bhejna,
chahe to niche ki 2 goli kam kar dena!
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Galib se ek dost ne kaha:
Jo Shrab pite hai unki dua kbul nahi hoti
Galib ne jawab diya:
Jinhe Sharab mil gayi unhe dua ki jarurat nahi hoti
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Wife: Kal aap ne Padosan ke saath moovi dekhi..?
Husband: Kya kare..
Aaj kal ki movie Biwi Bachon ya family ke
saath dekhne laayak kaha banti hai..?
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Sir: Angrezo Ne CHAND par PANI
aur BARAF ki Khoj kar li hai.
Batao isse tumne kya sikha
Santa: Bas humein ab sirf DAARU
aur NAMKEEN Leke Jana hai…
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Man is a simple Animal.
His daily needs are just …
Rosy & Roti !!
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Question:
Wo kya cheeze hai jo wife apne husband ko sari umar nahi deti
Socho..
Ans:
Chain ki Saans…
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Girlfrnd: Es week roj shopping karenge, next week roj movie dekhenge.
Boyfrnd: Uske agle week roj mandir jayenge.
Girlfrnd: Kyu?
Boyfrnd: Bheekh maangne.
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2 Dost salo baad mile.
Pata chala dono ki shadi ho gai hai.
Sonu: Kaisi hai teri biwi.
Monu: Swarg ki apsra hai,
Aur teri
Sonu: Meri to abhi jinda hai!!
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Son came home drunk,
to avoid moms scolding he took a laptop and started working
Mom: Ru drunk?
Kid: No
Mom: Phir suitcase khol ke kya kar raha hai??
1
University exam mein WIFE per essay likhne ko kaha gya.
1 student ne sirf 1 hi sentence likha aur usey pure marks mile,
She has a Problem for every Solution
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Maine tere ko yaad kiya, abhi k abhi..
Aur mera Sms bhi aya, abhi ke abhi..
Mai tujhe yaad karu to tera Sms jarur aana chahiye, abhi ke abhi..
Kyuki kuch bhi karne ka lekin mera ego hurt nai karneka..
Aali re aali, aata tuji bari aali..
Agar tera mSg nai aya to…. Majhi Satkel..!!
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Ek ladki ki shirt par car bani thi
Ek bachcha us shirt par bani car ko dekh raha tha
us ladki ne bacche se kaha ki kabhi car nahi dekhi kya
phir us bacche ne kaha car to dekhi hai
par ase speed breaker nahi DEKHE..!!
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Notice it plz:
-MENopause
-MENstruation
-MENstrual pain
-MENtal illness
-GUYnocologist
-HISterectomy
Ever Noticed that All Ladies problems start with a men!!!
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Ek ladki raste pe akeli jaa rahi thi.
Ek ladka bola-ghar tak lift chahiye kya?
Ladki- bhag saale, 3 din se lift le rahi hu,
Ab tak ghar nahi pahunchi
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A Nice and True Slogan on the T-shirt of a MAN:
Do Not Disturb,
I am Married and Already Disturbed..!!
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Saari raat guzar jaati hai
bas isi kashmakash main ke!!
Razai lambi
kidhar se hai aur choti kidhar se!!
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India Is Facing Serious Questions..
Hum Cloromint kyu khate hai?
Melody itni Chocolaty kyu hai?
And Now..
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Di?
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Khubsurat ladkiyan zyada padhai nahi karti
bcoz wo janti hai ke duniya ke kisi kone mein koi
gadha unke liye engineer ya doctor banraha hoga.
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Principle to Students:
U people must sleep atleast 7 hrs a day..
Student: Impossible Sir!!!
School is only for 6 hrs
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One Boy To Another,
What Did U Do On Mothers Day?
2nd Boy,
I Tried To Help Few Girls To Become A Mother
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Always smile
Do U know Why??
Bcoz Haso! Jiyo!
Muskurao! Khush raho!
Kya Pata!!
KalAage ke do DAAT ho na ho!!
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Blind boy giving sweet to all.
Aunty came from bathroom
without dress to get sweets,
knowing he’s blind.
Aunty: what’s special?
Boy: I got my eyes!
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2 minute ke liye Moun rakho
Un Machharo ki atma ki shanti ke liye,
Jo kal raat apko katne ke bad Dybitiz se mar gaye.
Bcoz UR So So So Sweet!
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2 ladies ko 20 sal ki jail ki saza mili
20 sal tak jail mein guzarne ke bad
Jab dono riha hui to dono ne muskurate hue kaha…..
Chalo ab baki bate ghar pahoch ke karte hai.
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Worried man to Psychologist
My GF treats me as if I Were a DOG!
Psych: She abuses U, Hits U, Starves U?
Man: No. No. Worse!
She wants me to be FAITHFUL
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May God break the front teeth of all ur secret enemies…
So that U will recognize them when they give a fake smile at u!
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