STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Budhi Mahila: Yamraj Ji, Mujhe waqt se pehle kyun utha liya?
Yamraj: Bidhiya dimag mat chaat, March mein closing thi, Target poora karna tha.
841 
Teacher: Batao Ganga Kahan Se Nikalti Hai Aur Kaha Ja Ke Milti Hai?
Pappu: Madam, Ganga School Ke Bahane Ghar Se Nikalti Hai Aur Mandir Ke Piche Vivek Se Jaakar Milti Hai.
48
Teacher to Electronics Students: NAADE ko english me kya kehte hain?
1 Student: PHD.
Teacher: Kya matlab?
Student: Pajama Holding Device.
287
Good teacher is that who suggests you during exams to work hard.
But best teacher is that who tells you in exams,
kanjro, parchiyaan chaab jaao, flying aa gayi.
497
Madam: Pappu Ek Story Sunao With Moral.
Pappu: Maine Use Phone Kara Wo So Rahi Thi,
Phir Baad Mein Usne Muje Phone Kra Main So Raha Tha.
Moral: Jaisi Karni Vaisi Bharni.
41
Himesh Reshammiya ka kutta ghar se bhag gaya.
Dusre Kutto ne pucha tu kyun bhaga?
Kutta: Sala raat ko gane ki practice khud karta hai, subah log mujhe marte the.
981
Teacher: Agar Tum tumari GF Ko 500 Do, aur Usko sirf 200 Ki Zarurat Ho To, Wo Kitne Wapas Degi?
Student: Kuchh Bhi Nahi.
Teacher: Kya Tum Itni si bhi Maths Nahi Jante?
Student: Sir, Aap meri gf Ko Nai Jante.
536
She: Heyyy! Where Are U From?
What Do U Do? Job Or Study?
What Are Ur Hobbies?
Whats Ur Age?
Reply Na Please.
Me: Tera E-mail Address De Resume Sends Karta Hu.
204
Mom: School ja.
kid: Nahi jaunga.
Mom: kyun?
kid: Job kar lunga.
Mom: Nalayak beshram Class 2 mein padh k kya job karega?
kid: Class 1 ki ladkiyo ko tution padhaunga.
752
Santa 2 Wife: Jaanu Coke Peene k Baad Kuch Karney,
Ko Dil Chah Raha hai?
Wife: Sharmate Hue Karo na Jee.
Santa: BrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrr.
854
Santa Papa se: Papa class mein Banta mujhe GAY bol kar chidhata hai.
Papa: To tune use maara kyun nahi?
Santa: I can’t papa, He is so Hot.
751
Lady Teacher ne,
MY TEACHER par 10 lines likhne ko kaha.
Thodi der bad golu ne uthkar pucha: Madam,
MAST CHHAMIYA ko english me kya kahte hain?
905
Police: Oye, tune Papita Bechne wali ko kiss kyon kiya?
Santa: Sir, main bhi kya karta wo itni der se mere ghar ke bahar chilla rahi thi,
PAPPI TE LE LO,
PAPPI TE LE LO.
894
Mom: Beta zara Papa ko Bulana.
Me To Dad: Chalo Bulava Aya,
Hai Mata ne Bulaya Hai.
Dad: Beta Zor se bolo.
Me: Jai Mata Di.
Flying Chappal.
283
She : Shopping kara do plz.
Me : Kya baby ? That's wrong shaadi se pehle kuchh bhi nahi.
847
Patni: Dekhoji, hamaare shantabai ke pati,
Usko khush rakhne ke liye, Har hafte movie pe le jaate hai. Aap kyu nahi karte ho aise?
Pati: Arey, Maine bhi shantabai ko movie ke liye bulaaya. lekin usne manaa kardi, Isme meri kya galti hai?
607
Boy: I love you.
SBI Girl: Abhi lunch time hai baad mein aao.
Boy comes after 1 hr,
Boy: I love you.
sbi GIRL: I have a boyfriend.
419
Conveying is an art.
Wife: I have a good news and a bad news,
Husband: I am very busy Just give me good news,
Wife: The airbags worked properly in our new Audi.
254
Sir: Koi bata sakta hai Bhagwan ne ladkiya kyu banayi?
Me: Hamari zindagi jhand karne ko.
After a long pause.
Sir: Aansu laa diye tere jawab ne.
Class ke baad mil Daru pite hai.
781
Human brain is the most,
outstanding object in world.
It functions 24 hours a day 365 days a year.
It functions right from the time we are born,
And stop only when we enter the examination hall.
967
Teacher: Who is Mahatma Gandhi?
Student: He is the one who helped.
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend.
635
Train Chali,
Bheed Badhi,
Itne Me Break Lagi,
1Ladka Ladki Se Ja Takraya,
Ladki Boli: Janwar Ho Kya?
Ladka: Jaan To Tum Ho,
Hum To War Hai.
475
Kbi kisi ladki se book nahi mangni chahiye warna maar pad sakti h.
Book it means,
B: baby
O: only
O: one
K: kiss.
386
Ek cheenti auto mein baithi, aur ek per bahar rakha.
Driver: Madam per andar kar lo.
Cheenti: Nahin, mujhe haathi ko laat marni hai,
Saala kal aankh maar kar gaya tha.
581
Santa ne Banta ko Hindi SMS bheja: Bhejane wala mahaan,
padhane wala gadha.
Banta gusse me vapis sms bhejta hai: Bhejane wala gadha,
padhane wala mahaan.
564
Jaan hai mujhko zindagi se pyaari,
jaan ke liye kar doon kurban yaari,
jaan ke liye todd doon dosti tumhaari,
ab tumse kya chhupaana,
tum hi toh ho jaan hamaari.
640
Jaan hai mujhko zindagi se pyaari,
jaan ke liye kar doon kurban yaari,
jaan ke liye todd doon dosti tumhaari,
ab tumse kya chhupaana,
tum hi toh ho jaan hamaari.
640
Teri Chahat Ab Meri Aankhon Me Hai,
Teri Khushbu Meri Sanson Me Hai,
Mere Dil Ko Jo Ghayal Kar Jaye,
Aisi Ada Sirf Teri Baaton Me Hi Hai..
645
Santa: Yaar, Main jo bhi kaam shuru krta hoon meri biwi beech mein aa jaati hai.
Banta: Tu Truck chala kar dekh, shayad kismat sath de de.
552
Ek teacher ka darja ek maa se kahin oopar hota hai kyun ki,
Ek maa apni god mein sirf ek bachche ko sulati hai lekin,
Teacher apne lecture se poori class ko sula deti hai.
230
Jagjit Singh singing: Yeh daulat bhi le lo,
Yeh shohrat bhi le lo.
Suddenly Santa stands up & says: Main toh bahut pareshan hun,
Meri toh aurat bhi le lo.
204
Baap Bahot Gusse me: Sharab, Cigarette,
Ladkiyan Ye Sab Tumhari Jaan,
K Dushman Hain.
Beta Proudly: Jo Insaan Apne,
Dushmano Se Bhaag jaye,
Wo Mard Nahi Hota Papa.
383
A scooty girl overtook a biker boy.
Boy shouted: Hey, buffalo.
Girl replied looking behinnd
You buffalo, donkey, monkey,Doggy.
Suddenly she got accident, bcz she crashed wid buffalo.
Girls can never understand the feeling of boys their attitude is their biggest enemy.
458
Husband: Cricket wala channel lagao.
Wife: Nahi lagaungi.
Husband: Dekh lunga.
Wife: Kya dekhloge?
Husband: Yahi channel jo tum dekh rahi ho.
395
Ek baar Husand or wife me ladayi
Ho rahi thi.
Unka chota bacha bhi waha baitha tha,
Husband- tu sali kutti,
Wife- tu sala kutta,
Baccha masumiyat se bola,
Aur mai sala puppy.
511
Bachcha: Doodh peene se rang gora hota hai?
Doctor: Haa, hota hai.
Bachcha: Jhooth, Phir bhains ka bachcha kaala kyun hota hai?
572
Mareez (Nurse se): I love you Tumne mera dil chura liya hai.
Nurse (Sharmate hue): Chal jhuthe, humne to dil ko hath bhi nahin lagaya,
Humne to sirf Kidney churai hai.
480
Girl- Main jab bhi phone kerti hu tum Shaving ker rahe hote ho.
Din me kitni baar shaving kerte ho?
Boy- 30-40 baar.
Girl- pagal ho kya?
Boy- pagal nahi NAAYI hun.
816
Maine ek Dr. se puchha,
Bacche itne shararti kyu hote hai.
Fantastic jawab mila: Jo cheez banti hi shararat se hai wo sharif kaise ho sakti hai.
587
Patni Subah Uthkar Pati Ke Pair Chooti Hai
Aur
Pati Raat Me Uske Dono Pair Apne Kandhe Par Le Leta Hai.
This Is Called As:
Give Respect & Take Respct.
860
Mere Ko Bas Teri Hi Pyas Lagti Rehti Hai ,
Man Main Har Waqt Tere Aane Ki Aas Rehti Hai ,
Teri Dewaangi Main Is Kadar Diwane Ho Gye,
Ke Harr Ladki Ki Maa Ab To Saas Lagti Hai.
964
Ravan: Cigarette hai kya ?
Hanuman: Nahin.
Ram: Ek packet hai na.
Hanuman: Aap chup rahiye prabhu, saale ke 10 sir hain, pura packet khatam ho jayega.
962
Teacher: who is Tipu Sultan?
Pappu: I dont know miss.
Teacher: Concentrate on your studies.
Pappu: Do u know Jennifer?
Teacher: i dont know.
Pappu: Concentrate on your husband.
578
Teacher: BIRBAL KON Tha?
Student: Pata nahi.
Teacher: Padhai pe Dhayn do, to pata Chalega.
Student: Jacky kaun hai?
Teacher: Pata nahi.
Student: Beti pe dhayn do, to pata Chalega.
513
NURSERY k student Anuj ne Exam sheet pe SUSU kar Diya.
TEACHER: Ye kya kiya hai.
STDNT: Mummy ne kaha tha ki Pehle jo Aa Raha ho wahi karna.
419
Bf ne gf ke purs se chupke se cell nikala dekhne ke liye ki mera kiss naam se numb save hai,
Honey Or Sweetheart,
Jab Bf ne apne cell se numb milaaya to likha tha,
Recharge waale bhaiya.
563
Ek aadmi ghabraya hoa police station pr aaya aur bola,
Muje girftaar kr lijye main ne apni bivi k ser pr danda mara hai.
Inspctor: kiya wo mar gye?
Aadmi: nahi wo danda lye mere peche aa rahi hai.
275
Santra: Main ball k tarah lagta hu,
Akhrot: Main toh brain k tarah,
Mushroom: Main toh umbrella k tarah,
Kela: Plz Topic change kro yaar.
56
A child had never seen his hips,
1 day his teacher beat him on his hips,
He comes back home n see his hips in the mirror & says
BAAPLE! DO TUKLE KAL DIYE.
403
Girl: Mere erade bade nek hain.
Aap 1000 me se ek hain.
Boy: Dimag ke hum bhi don hain.
Kameeni pahle ye bata baki k 999 kaun hain.
224